Moments from this Week – 16

This week is about Nathaniel’s Farmer’s Market, Recital night, journaling, The Princess Bride which I am reading for Lit Club, and just some small lovely times at work and home.

And David practicing the proof for the quadratic formula.


Moments from this Week 2018 is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Books I Read This Week 2018 – 16

A lot of books this week, partly because I read some really good ones and partly because we did quite a bit of driving.

I knew I’d want to read Lisa Genova’s  Every Note Played  because her books are so good. And this wasn’t a disappointment. But I will say I didn’t love it as much as her previous books. Though I did really like it.

Census was weird, unusual, short and interesting. I am glad I read it.

The Broken Girls was not my type of book but I still read it in one breath. I was interesting. A weird hybrid of supernatural, thriller, mystery, and historical fiction.

I found out about I Stop Somewhere  through a goodreads reader I follow. I would have never picked this book up and I was incredibly painful to read. I thought of putting it down several times but I couldn’t tear myself away. I read the book in one gulp. It broke my heart and made me mad and made me weep inside my soul.

The Astonishing Color of After was also another amazing read. It was so magical and beautiful and heart wrenching. All at once. It was absolutely beautiful.

In Conclusion, Don’t Worry About It was a quick, fun, thought provoking read between books that were hard to read but wonderful. I really enjoyed this one and really loved what Lauren Graham said.

I Have Lost My Way is the new Gayle Forman book. She is one of my favorites so I knew I would love it and I did. A lot of YA this week. Unusual for me in 2018 but the ones this week were all exceptionally good.

Here’s to reading more fantastic books. 


Books I Read this Week 2018 is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

On My Mind – 16 – Being Intentional

Last week at work someone made an offhanded comment that got stuck in my head. And then I followed up on the comment with someone else, and their response, even though delivered kindly and with explanation, also got stuck in my head. And I’ve been spinning on those all week.

I’ve also been waking up in the middle of the night worrying about my upcoming flights to Sydney and Tokyo. I am staying in Sydney until Saturday because I get there on Tuesday this time and thought staying three days would be insane. But now I am worried that maybe I should have come back Friday so as to not spend all Saturday recovering from my flight and wasting my weekend with the kids. For Tokyo, I am leaving around 6am on Mother’s Day and flying through Seoul so I can go business class and it’s taking me around 6 hours longer. I am wondering if I should have left a day later and not missed another weekend day with my kids but then reminding myself that getting there a day early is probably the sane thing to do especially since I will only be there for three days. And yet, I wake up in the middle of the night worrying about all these things. The comments people make, the flights I’ve already booked, the one, two days I will miss.

And all this worrying is making me stay awake at night so that when I am with my kids, on vacation, I am exhausted, unable to be present, or my mind is spinning and not focusing on being here with them now. 

What a waste.

Here’s what I know: I like my job, I like being good at my job, I like working. I even like working hard.

But.

But I love my family. I love my kids. I love watching my boys grow up. I love sitting and doing work with them. I love hearing about how their days went. I love being deeply connected with their lives.  I know that I have another 4-5 years before David is off to college and another 8 with Nathaniel before he, too, starts his own journey. I want to be here for all of those days and I don’t want to go chase some stupid career goal I don’t have.

It’s so easy for me to spin other people’s throw away comments. I’m such a pleaser that I worry constantly that I am not pleasing someone. Some comment about going away when I should be here with my kids, or how I travel so much, some comment about how my title should be X or Y. Some comment about how I am not doing enough. It doesn’t even matter who is commenting, I just always want to apologize and please. 

Of course, doing that doesn’t work. Because if I am pleasing someone, I am displeasing someone else. Time and attention are limited resources and if they are going to one place, they are not going to another at the same time. When I feel unsure of my own choices and destination, it becomes that much easier for me to sway with others’ comments. For me to spin constantly.

But when I know what I want, I listen so much differently. I hear what they say and then filter that through what matters to me. What resonates with my own values and thoughts and goals. I take what helps and leave the rest. I am so much better at walking down my own path when I know what that path is. 

This is why it’s so important to me to live intentionally. I know that when I have spent time thinking about the life I want to live, I am so much better at constructing it, sticking to it, and living it. 


On My Mind is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Stronger Than Before – 16

Weekly Intention: This week is a long but normal work week. I have a ton of meetings and I will be spending all of Wednesday in a day-long meeting but for the most part I have no trips to school, no evening events except for prepping for the Wednesday meeting. I am hoping this means I can go to sleep early every night. My plan and intention for this week is twofold: to spend a bit of time thinking about my new job more and then to rest as much as possible.

This month’s intention is: Emotionally Strong: This is the time to work on being a better version of you. And loving you. Loving what is.  Respond and don’t react. Journal more. Doing a really crappy job of journaling, I am hoping to do better soon.

One way I will stretch this week:  I am taking a “learn how to bike” class this weekend. it will be stretching me a lot.

One boundary I will set this week: bedtime and rest time.

This week, I will focus on pleasing: my body a bit. it needs so much more rest than it’s getting.

One new thing I will learn this week: how to ride a bike!

One area where I will go deeper this week: i want to do better with the journaling, with understanding how i’m feeling.

What do I need to sit with this week? i need to sit with how i feel about my new job. and the next few months. i want to spend some time thinking about it deeply. so i can live intentionally. (I didn’t do this last week, maybe this week.)

I am looking forward to: going to bed early. πŸ™‚ 

This week’s challenges: learning to bike is going to be really challenging especially if my sciatica isn’t  better by then.

Top Goals: 

  • Work:  figure out what’s next, get summits squared away, make summer plans.
  • Personal: pilates daily, journal, figure out food.
  • Family: buy nathaniel presents, book cars in europe,  finish booking summer camps

I will focus on my values:

  • Love: i think my body needs a little extra love this week. extra rest.
  • Learn: learn to think about how i want my job to evolve.
  • Peace: peace with resting.
  • Service: this week’s service is work for the all day meeting.
  • Gratitude: my full life and my body for putting up with me.

This week, I want to remember: to enjoy the regular, quieter weeks like this one.


Stronger Than Before is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Weekly Reflection 2018 – 15

How I got Stronger this week: This was a week of work and vacation combined. The kids were on Spring Break all week. I worked on Monday and Tuesday and then we went to Southern California to begin our vacation. This was an atypical vacation for us in that we spent 4 nights in 3 different hotels. We spent the first almost three days in Garden Cove, California which is right near Disneyland. But we stayed in The Great Wolf Lodge which is a hotel with a giant waterpark in it. David had stayed in one of these in Washington, D.C. when he went with his class last year, so we came here because we knew he’d love it. And we weren’t wrong. In fact, all three boys loved it. When I was a teenager, I used to love all these things, too. But it seems I’ve grown out of them and didn’t really enjoy it all that much anymore. Mostly because that feeling of being scared a bit doesn’t really appeal to me anymore. I spent about 4 hours hanging put with them and doing a few rides and that was plenty for me. I am proud of myself for doing it because I’ll admit that I was quite scared and I’ve been feeling a bit off all week. I had very strong sciatica from a wedding I went to last week and I’ve been in pain all over and that also meant I can’t sleep well so I’ve been exhausted to boot. But I drove more than halfway to down here, I went on the water slides, and I did my pilates every single morning. I’ve been keeping at getting stronger. I know I have such a long way to go and sometimes that makes me really sad but then I remind myself that I am trying every single day and that’s the best I can do for now. When I can do more, I will.

Top Goals Review: almost booked speaker, we are pretty much set. Getting summit organized, made a lot of progress. did pilates daily. did not book cars yet. booked a few summer camps, have ideas for others as well. have not figured out dinner πŸ™ bought a few presents for nathaniel and will buy more. Enjoyed vacation! 

I celebrate: I celebrate our lovely little vacation. I love being with my family.

I am grateful for: California. I love this state. I love living here. 

Karen’s Points: doing pilates and skin still and the journaling now. i’ve made no progress here and my life is only going to get more hectic in the next few months, so I am not sure what to do.

A Change I embraced: vacation is all about change. I am working on adjusting. 

I let go of: so many of my issues so I could enjoy the water park with the kids.

Core Desired Feelings Check-in:

  • Fresh: water park was fresh and new for me.
  • Magical: it was magical to see my kids having so much fun and to be together as a family for a little while.
  • Lighter: Lighter now that i’ve been on vacation a little bit.
  • True: i’m feeling pretty exhausted. I think I will need to take some stock and figure out how to feel less exhausted before my two long, long trips in May.

Where I chose Joy: i chose joy by taking my whole family on vacation.

I showed up for: everyone. πŸ™‚

A Mistake I made this week: i had a bit of an awkward (i thought so at least) moment at work but I am working on letting it go.

What I tolerated this week: a lot lot lot lot of sciatica pain. a lot. πŸ™

My mood this week was: grateful and exhausted. 

I forgive myself for: feeling so extremely tired. 

What I love right now: my boys, my life, my moments when i can pause enough to enjoy them.


Weekly Reflection is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Moments from this Week – 15

This week is about the TEDx we went to at the kids’ school. My friend Evelyn’s bachelorette party. And just some family time together.

I also took some photos in the girls’ bathroom at the high school because it was full of inspiring notes.

My notebook was getting huge since I have been using it since August, so I finally bought extender rings and a new set of covers. I moved last year into a new binder, using the old gold rings I had and then changed this one to be the big black ones which I am hoping means they will last till December.


Moments from this Week 2018 is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Books I Read This Week 2018 – 15

A small week this week, partly because I was busy at nights and didn’t get to read as much.

Chris Bohjalian hasn’t had anything I could read for a while so I was happy when The Flight Attendant came out. But alas I thought it was only okay. Not bad but also not fantastic.

Big Potential was good. I am not into business books as much as I probably should be but I really like Shawn Achor and this book didn’t disappoint.

I’ll Be Your Blue Sky was my light read of the week and I think I don’t have much patience for light reads anymore. It was ok but also not all that amazing.

Not the very best book week but it was still okay. 


Books I Read this Week 2018 is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

On My Mind – 15 – Living the Moments

As we approach the end of the school year, there are a lot of moving parts in my days. The kids’ schools have culminations or discussions around what next year looks like. They have school trips and projects that are finishing up or final projects starting up. My kids’ school doesn’t have exams or grades so that’s less of an issue for us, but compared to what they do instead, exams might be easier and certainly would take less effort from the parents’ perspective πŸ™‚

Anyhow, so this season is about to end which means we’re going to transition into summer and then transition into a new year in the fall. I generally don’t do well with transitions because of the relatively regimented life I live. I don’t like all the readjustment I have to make. Especially since I’ve recently made a huge readjustment as I move into my new role. 

But one of the things I’m learning is that life is all about transition and as I walk into the next few years, I see many big transitions in our life. My son will transition to high school in one more year. My little one will be transitioning into middle school at the same time. And then just a few years after we’ll be neck deep in college tours etc and then he will hopefully transition to college (and high school for the other.) these are big transitions. We will then have to transition into being home alone. Just writing this down makes me want to weep. 

And yes, I know these are still 5-8 years away for us. But I also know how quickly time passes. I know that there will be tens of other transitions I can’t even imagine now (hopefully positive ones and not unexpected sad ones.) Life never goes according to plans. But here’s what I’m thinking as I sit here: life is passing by so quickly. I can’t remember most of the last 13 years and definitely not much before we had David. I remember many moments of course but I can’t remember the way I lived when I was 15 or 20 or 25. I can’t remember details of my daily life. 

And chances are when I am 55 I won’t remember the details of this life. The stuff I fret about now, the ways I use my time, the books I read, the lunches I pack, the things that frustrate me. It will all slip away. What I will remember is how a moment felt. The moment David saw Nathaniel for the first time. The moment they both started school. The big moments and also the little ones about how they like their ice cream. How it feels to snuggle with Jake on the couch etc. My life is all the moments I live with the people I love.

As all these transitions come and go, I want to focus on those moments. I want to really be present in the moments. So much so that I can lock in the way they feel, the smells, the sounds, the way my heart swells and fills me with light inside. The deep contentment I have in those moments. I want to remember those and take them with me forever. 

So as we walk into this new season of summer and adventures, this is what I want to remember. Live the moments. 

 


On My Mind is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Stories from 2018 – 15 – Farmer’s Market

Nathaniel’s Third Grade class put on a Farmer’s Market on Tuesday. where each kid was given a $20 budget and they had to but items and then prepare a dish and decide how much to charge. He made yogurt parfaits.

And started with $3 but then went to $2.50 and $2.00 within the hour πŸ™‚

They made the parfaits right in front of you while you waited.

He partnered with a friend from class. They had a lot of fun together.

Here’s everyone at the beginning when they are clapping before they start.

He and his partner made a decent profit and the whole class got to donate more than 1000$ to charity. All in all, it was a wonderful event! 


Stories from 2018 is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018here.

Stronger Than Before – 15

Weekly Intention: This is an unusual week. The kids have no school. I have to work some of the week and we’ll be on vacation for another part of the week. I have long days for the days when I am working. So I plan to really be present when I am working and not worry about home as much as possible and get a ton done so I don’t feel like I am leaving anything on the table. I then plan to really be present for my kids and husband during our time off. I am hoping to relax and read and play and enjoy our vacation. Let’s see if I can pull it off.

This month’s intention is: Emotionally Strong: This is the time to work on being a better version of you. And loving you. Loving what is.  Respond and don’t react. Journal more. Journaling so far!!

One way I will stretch this week:  maybe i can enjoy the water park, too?

One boundary I will set this week: i will not work while i am away. I can do this!

This week, I will focus on pleasing: my boys. i will do my best to make this holiday magical for them.

One new thing I will learn this week: maybe a little more rock climbing.

One area where I will go deeper this week: deeper journaling, i am hoping. 

What do I need to sit with this week? i need to sit with how i feel about my new job. and the next few months. i want to spend some time thinking about it deeply. so i can live intentionally.

I am looking forward to: a little time off.

This week’s challenges: not worrying about work when i am away.

Top Goals: 

  • Work:  book speaker, get summit organized. make progress.
  • Personal: pilates daily, book cars in europe, book summer camps, figure out dinner.
  • Family: buy nathaniel presents. enjoy vacation!

I will focus on my values:

  • Love: be extra loving with my kids and hubby!!
  • Learn: learn to think about how i want my job to evolve.
  • Peace: peace with work piling up while i am gone.
  • Service: this week’s service is to my whole family.
  • Gratitude: for some time off.

This week, I want to remember: every day i get is magic. i am so grateful.


Stronger Than Before is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Weekly Reflection 2018 – 14

How I got Stronger this week: Now that April is here, I’ve changed my morning exercise. I’ve been doing Pilates every morning. I’m following this online plan I found for 21 days of Pilates. It comes with rest days but then it’s yoga on those days. It’s been good and hard. I’ve also booked all the hotels for Europe and that was incredibly hard for me. I know it might sound small to many but these are not simple tasks for me. This was a long week and I’ve made it through so I consider that a win in the getting stronger column, too.

 

Top Goals Review: made progress with both speakers and summer planning, found someone for staff meeting. found and doing april exercise, didn’t book car in europe, but booked hotels in europe, and booked hotel for next week, and booked rock climbing, still working on figuring out dinner. helped david with ideas a tiny bit. sent initial email for nathaniel’s birthday, phew.

I celebrate: I celebrate making progress on several fronts this week, including booking hotels and getting some work progress.

I am grateful for: my husband, i know i say it all the time but he’s there for me again and again.

Karen’s Points: doing  pilates and skin still and the journaling now. i’m going to see if I can sort this out this week.

A Change I embraced: honestly i am still learning to embrace the changes that came with my new job.

I let go of: most of my evenings this week. i’ve been at the kids’ school or having to help them prepare.

Core Desired Feelings Check-in:

  • Fresh: journaling again after having not done so in a while has been an interesting challenge.
  • Magical: it was magical to see nathaniel and his friend making and selling parfaits at the farmer’s market at school
  • Lighter: Lighter now that i’ve booked our vacation and hotels. a few more things to do before i feel all done.
  • True: i am really looking forward to connecting with myself again through journaling.

Where I chose Joy: i chose joy by spending tuesday morning at school for nathaniel and evening at school for david. both were amazing opportunities to see my children at their best.

I showed up for: my kids this week.

A Mistake I made this week: i got my first parking ticket this week, parked on the side with street cleaning :(.

What I tolerated this week: i’ve been waking up at 2am every night this week and unable to fall back asleep so I am exhausted and overwhelmed.

My mood this week was: quiet. it’s been an odd week. 

I forgive myself for: the times when i just don’t feel like doing anything. 

What I love right now: that we have some vacation coming up.


Weekly Reflection is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.

Moments from this Week – 14

This week is about the stem fair at school, Brene visiting google, my new car, and lovely flowers.

And Nathaniel’s letter! 


Moments from this Week 2018 is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.