
I’ve been trying hard to read a book a week again. Some weeks I do well,
and others, not as well. But reading is really important to me. It’s my
way of recharging, escaping, learning and growing. So I am working to
feed this need. I wanted to make sure to track all the books I’ve read.
So here’s a post about my last few books that I haven’t posted about.
Marley
and Me was a book I’d been meaning to read for a long, long time. I
finally checked it out a few months ago and was mostly disappointed.
Maybe that’s why I’d been putting it off for a long time. I sort of had
a hunch that it wouldn’t be great. I can’t even put my finger on what I
didn’t like about it and it was heart-warming and all that. It just
didn’t do it for me.

Once I discovered Picault, you knew I was going to read so very much
more of her, and of course, I did. I first read Vanishing
Acts and wasn’t nearly as impressed as I’d been with My Sister’s
Keeper. I wondered if that book was an anomaly, an exceptional book, a
formula that can’t be repeated. I wasn’t sure but I so badly didn’t want
it to be true. This is not to say I didn’t like Vanishing Acts. It was
so-so. If I hadn’t already read the other one, I probably would have
loved it. But I’d seen what she was capable of and I wanted more. So
much more.

So then I picked up Ninteeen Minutes which was fabulous. Made me feel good about Jodi
Picoult again. The story was gripping and even though I knew there would
be a twist at the end, I was still surprised and loved every moment of
reading this story. Kudos to any writer who can take a really difficult
issue like school shootings and making an amazing story out of it so
it’s about how hard it is to be yourself. How much we need to fit in.
How much it can hurt to be teased and mercilessly made fun of. People
who haven’t had the abuse on that level can never understand how
life-changing and soul-changing it can be. This book illustrates it
wonderfully from many points of view. All interesting. Still not as good
as My Sister’s Keeper but quite a fantastic book.

I can’t even remember where I read about Welcome
to Oz but I am glad I did. The techniques shown by the author look
easy here but they are not. I loved all the details about the light and
the black and white techniques. Shows me that I have a long, long way to
go before I can call myself a Photoshop connoisseur. I love his effects.
I love his patience. I love his work. The drama, the story, the color.
It’s all quite wonderful. This is one book, I’ve checked out multiple
times just to make sure I can master his skills.

The Palo Alto library has a special section reserved for new books and
when I go in to checkout a hold, I always try to visit this section,
just to see. That’s how I discovered The
Lavender Hour and while I wouldn’t call it literature, it was a
wonderful read. I loved the writing, the story, and the characters.
Controversial topic, maybe, but mostly just a love story. If you need an
easy, little book, this one isn’t the worst choice.

Some
Nerve was another pick from the library’s new books section. It’s
nothing special. Easy, quick read about a gossip magazine writer who
tries to write about an actor, can’t and gets fired. Returns back to her
hometown, only to find that the same author is checked into the hospital
where she volunteers. Isn’t that a lovely coincidence? Life’s full of
them. But books have even more. Not the worst book I’ve ever read but
also not the best. A sweet, little book.

The
Life You Longed For was creepy, scary and a blazing fast read. The
worst possible subject ever: a mother hurting her kid, taken to an even
more terrible level: not actually hurting the kid but accused of doing
so. This is a perfect example of how good intentions can go bad and ruin
lives and be the wrong thing to do. It sad, scary and very engrossing.

I read Still
Life with Husband really quickly, which would normally imply that I
loved it. Fact is, when I finished, I didn’t know how I felt about it.
It took me a couple of days to really hate the book. Now, I am pretty
certain, I absolutely abhorred it. Terrible story. No plot worth
mentioning. Unrealistic, stupid ending. No empathy or even sympathy
towards the characters. Just could not enjoy this book.

Dark
Oval was another really fast read. About loss and sadness. The idea
of losing Jake is so tremendously scary to me that I wanted to be
finished with this book quickly just so I didn’t have to think about the
possibility of his death. Life can be depressing, ironic and so very
frustrated. I thought this book was realistic. Depressing but realistic
and a wonderful read.

Considering the fact that The Kite Runner was my favorite book of 2005,
it was predictable that I would buy his second book the second it came
out. A
Thousand Splendid Suns is a wonderful, wonderful story. While it can
never be as good as Kite Runner, this one has its own special place
since it’s about women and not men. It’s about the friendship of two
otherwise very different women. It’s touching, thought-provoking,
depressing, heart-wrenching. It’s amazing how much he can educate his
readers about Afghanistan without any preaching or anything boring. I’m
from the area, I normally dont’ enjoy reading stories about the Middle
East. But he is an exception. I love his books. I devour them. I can’t
wait until the next one.

Another layout inspired by the wonderful Cathy Zielske.
David’s one of the nicest humans I’ve ever met. Despite the fact that he
gets mad ten times a day now, he’s the sweetest little boy and while I’d
love to take the credit, I wanted him to know that it’s all him. We’re
so lucky.
Journaling Reads:
People who’ve never had kids have a tendency to think that parents
should have full control of their children at all times. When a kid
misbehaves, they think he or she has parents who don’t know how to raise
kids and when a kid is well behaved, they think the parents raised him well.
I think I was mostly a sad girl. I was shy and I cried a lot. Daddy, on
the other hand, was a happy little boy. I don’t think his parents did
anything too different than mine. So I was really nervous and I wanted
to make sure I did it all correctly with you to ensure you “turned out
well.”
As it turns out; you’re the world’s best boy, ever. You’re such a happy
boy that everyone loves you. You’re kind and don’t ever hit anyone. If
others attack you, you just walk away. You say hi to everyone and even
give them a hug. You’re cute and charming and know how to flirt. You are
self-reliant and can play with a toy for hours. You love to draw so when
we go out to restaurants, eating a full meal is rarely a problem for us.
You love us and you show it regularly. You’re never stingy with your
hugs and lately you’ve started giving us big kisses multiple times a
day. You love both your parents equally. You can get annoyed easily but
you recover quickly and never hold a grudge. It’s really easy to make
you laugh.
Of course you have your set of flaws, but overall you’re such a
pleasant, easy going, loveable boy that Daddy and I couldn’t have asked
for anything more. I’d love to take all the credit for “how well you
turned out,” but I know it has nothing to do with me. It even has
nothing to do with Daddy. While we love you very much and work hard to
be good parents, all the credit for your wonderful personality is yours.
It’s in the core of who you are, in your essence.
You just are the most amazing kid ever and we’re lucky to have the
privilege of being your parents.

My good friend Manu got married last night. I had the privilege of being
in the small invitee list. Their wedding was small, intimate, and a
testament to the fact that it’s not about anything except for the two
people creating a marriage and a life together. David had the luxury of
spending the night with us and enjoyed staying up until 10:30pm, the
latest he’s ever been up. He was well behaved all night and even cheered
when the ceremony was over.
This is my favorite shot from the
wedding. An intimate, genuine moment.
Congratulations, Manu and Hana, may you have a life full of love,
prosperity, luck, and good health.
It’s been a while since I’ve added a new section to the site but I’ve
finally managed to put together a new section which is mostly about my
relatively new hobby which has recently become mostly a favorite
pasttime (along with books of course.)
In honor of scrapbooking, which brings together my love of photography,
writing, and art, I created a new “create” section: find it here.
I have a lot of posts sitting in queue waiting to get posted. Expect
some blog diarrhea soon.

This is the first layout that David and I are both featured on. I want
to make sure that when he looks back, there are photos of Mommy and
Daddy as well as all of his.
Journaling Reads:
Since I am the official family photographer, there are very few photos
of you and me. I didn’t want you to look back years from now and wonder
what your mom looked like back then, so I told Daddy that we’re going to
start a new tradition where he takes pictures of you and me once a week.
When it was time for our shoot, I got both of us ready and got the
camera all setup for Daddy. The thing with two-year-olds is that they
don’t always adhere to your plans, so even though I thought it was time
for us to have some photos together; you didn’t necessarily feel the
same way. You weren’t in the mood to have your picture taken; you were
in the mood to play with chalk and to eat cookies.
We decided to go ahead with the shoot anyway and, as expected, most of
the photos came out with you making a funny face or running away. But I
am still so glad we did it because I love looking at the photos,
remembering how much we laughed trying to get you to pose, and now I
have proof of the wonderful times we spend together.
I always tell my clients that posed photos are not special; it’s better
to have authentic family moment photos, those that are genuinely you and
couldn’t have been created by anyone else. And now we have a set of our
own. Here’s to creating more next week.

I don’t know that this is the prettiest layout I’ve ever done but it’s
important for me to store this memory. David’s speech is a bit behind
and the doctor told me to go to a speech therapist with him for an
evaluation. I tend to have the personality of a person who’d completely
freak out at this kind of information so I used this layout as therapy
to show myself all the words David does say and how much he’s progressed
compared to two months ago.

I’ve recently bought eleven scrapbooking books. I am a big book person
and it only made sense that I would buy books when I decided to
seriously get into this hobby.
At the time, I didn’t know that Cathy Zielske’s fantastic Clean and Simple Scrapbooking – The Sequel was
exactly what I was looking for. I bought the sequel cause I was sure I had the first one. It turns out I didn’t. I had Scrapbooking Made Easy, but not Cathy’s first book. I loved this book so much that I am now considering going back and buying the first one.
So why did I like it so much?
Cathy’s book is exactly why I scrapbook. It’s all about the stories to tell. The essence of the people, of the memories, of the times. The pictures and the story are the most important part of the experience.
The paper, the embellishments; those are there to serve the story better. To draw attention to the photos in the right way, etc. Not that the embellishments are not important or fun, but just that having
the newest and prettiest isn’t the only way.
I love her honesty. Her ability to put her feelings and thoughts into words so well and her very clean, crisp designs that look easy to duplicate but really aren’t.
If you’re into plain and simple looks like I am and want to work on finding the story behind the photos, this is a fantastic book to use to help yourself get there.
I’ve been here. I know I’ve been quiet. But I’ve been here. Working
hard. Working long. Spending all my free time with David and Jake and
scrapbooking and reading and sleeping and watching TV and doing a bunch
of other not very constructive things.
Funny thing is. lately I’ve been thinking more and more about my life
before. Don’t ask me “before what?” Just before. I’ve been thinking
about all the classes I took, the languages, the saxophone, the
volunteering, the writing, the photography, and now the scrapbooking.
I’ve done a lot and I like living a full life.
Maybe I’m being too optimistic, but expect some changes soon.

So very precious.
I live with guilt twenty-four/seven.
No matter what time of the day or week you catch me, I can list five
things I feel guilty about. There are the typical things like the
chocolate I ate a few minutes ago, or the exercise I didn’t do, or the
emails sitting in my inbox. Things that are common to everyone’s life.
Things that make up New Year’s resolutions that never get met. They are
such shared experiences that books are written about them, careers are
made trying to monetize them, and they even have Hallmark cards about them.
`
These pangs of guilt live in the surface of life. The place where you
know it doesn’t much matter if I ate chocolate half an hour ago or end
up a size smaller or bigger next week. I know that the inbox will fill
again. I know that the friends will forgive me, and often will be too
busy to write back themselves. All it takes to fix these things is
admitting that while I would love for these issues to disappear, I don’t
really want to do the work or sacrifice they will need.
And then there is the big stuff. Spending time with family vs working
all hours of the night. Snapping at my husband when I’m pissed at a
coworker. Ignoring my kid because I am too tired and don’t want to deal
with whatever small thing he’s frustrated about right then. There are
the things that make you pick sides. Living in America vs being near my
family. Working vs staying home with David. Things that don’t come with
right answers. Things that a lot of work might not make go away. Things
that are not obvious.
Those are the cases where I wish someone would pull me aside and tell me
the secret answers. I know that guilt is a wasted
emotion. Yet, I can’t help it. I don’t want to have to sacrifice one
for the others. I want to know that I can love my son and be there for
him without taking the frustration out on my husband. I want to spend
time with the things I love and my son and get my work done. I want to
do a good job of it all.
I think that’s why I take so many pictures of David: to prove I was
there. I saw those moments, I experienced them. The funny thing is, the
camera is the reason I don’t end up experiencing them. Capturing the
moment and being in the moment are mutually exclusive. At least for me.
As much as I love the photos, I end up missing out in a bigger way.
Each time I am in one place, doing one thing, I am feeling guilty about
not being in the other place doing the other thing. Guilty that I am not
at home feeding him. Guilty that I didn’t go to work early and finish my
overflowing task list. Guilty that I am reading when it’s one of the few
hours in the week I get to see my family.
My new plan is to put a stop to all the guilt. Life’s too short and
maybe I could see more of David if I didn’t work so much. And maybe I
could be more successful at work if I didn’t have a family to go home
to. And maybe I could spend more time reading if I didn’t have either.
But I do. And I love all of them. And I can enjoy all of them. If only I
can enjoy the moment I am in instead of the one I’m not getting to
experience.
We pick sides all the time. And I am picking mine. I will have it all.
Maybe not simultaneously, maybe not even in equal doses at all times.
But, even the small doses can be magical if I stop worrying about where
I am not and instead enjoy where I am.

Next to my family, my favorite way to spend time is to read. With the
exception of horror and fantasy, I read and enjoy almost every kind of
book. But every now and then there’s that one book that comes along and
stops my whole life. When I find one of those, nothing else much
matters. I completely fall into the story. I take the book with me to
the bathroom. I take it in the car. I read it while I am waiting for the
microwave. I read it as I walk from room to room. I don’t put it down
for a second. I am so engulfed in these characters’ lives that I don’t
want to miss a moment of it.
Today was one of those days and My
Sister’s Keeper was that book. I can’t even remember why I put this
book on hold. I think I saw it at Walmart (in one of the very rare
occasions I sadly visited this establishment whose politics and employee
treatment I vehemently oppose) and I had heard of the Jodi Picoult many
times before and wanted to read her. I can’t tell you what made me pick
up the book last night over the 22 books I have checked out. But I can
tell you that since I picked it up, I didn’t put it down until I
finished it. I spent a good time crying afterwards just to get all the
pent up emotion out.
Jodi Picoult has a way with words. Not only does she create the most
relatable characters, but she knows how to take emotions and wrap them
around such simple, natural words that you wonder why no one else
thought to express that emotion in that exact way before. It’s like you
know exactly what she means.
This story is tragic. It’s horrifying. It’s a situation no parent ever
wants to be in. From the outside, you can take sides, you can judge. But
when you see the story from all the points of view, you can see the
conundrum so well. You know there’s no easy answer here. Even from the
very beginning, you know it’s not going to end well. But still, like the
parents, you keep hoping. But the author doesn’t disappoint. She doesn’t
cop out. She doesn’t create a Hollywood ending. To the contrary, all the
way to the very twist at end, the story holds true to its point.
Life is too short and no one gets to have a say at how things turn out.

When I read A Dirty Job back in January (or was it December?), I loved it so much that I wanted to read more Christopher Moore right away. So I checked out another book by him (The Stupidest Angel) and was really frustrated by how much I didn’t like it. A few months ago, I wanted to give it another try, so I checked out Coyote Blue. The book was funny and overall I enjoyed it. However, in the end, it lacked the un-put-downable-ness of A Dirty Job. I want to read more by him cause I do like his unique sense of humor, but I am not sure which of his books to pick up next…
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projects for twenty twenty-six
projects for twenty twenty-five
projects for twenty twenty-four
projects for twenty twenty-three
projects for twenty twenty-two
projects for twenty twenty-one
projects for twenty nineteen
projects for twenty eighteen
projects from twenty seventeen
monthly projects from previous years
some of my previous projects
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