May 2017 – Shining Means – 20

karenika.comThis card says: Shining means moving forward anyway and not letting others or the circumstances tell you who you are or what you are worth. Shining means sitting with the pain. Standing in the hard work of being there with the hurt. And doing it anyway. Being there + moving forward anyway.

I had this long conversation with David the other day in the car. I told him that I want him to not get so upset when he hears criticism from me. That I am the best person to criticize him because he knows without a doubt that I love him and he knows without a doubt that I will forever love him with all of my soul. So he knows that my criticism is coming from a place of love. From a place of encouraging him to learn and grow and try doing differently. 

I then told him that I would like him to take risks and to be brave and to be willing to fail. And that none of that can happen if he’s not open to criticism. Because failure comes with a lot of that and failure stings. And it’s hard. And it hurts.

And it’s inevitable.

We all fail. In ways small and big. I have yet to meet a person in my life who hasn’t failed. Because part of living is taking chances. However small. When you take a chance, there’s a statistical probability that you will fail. And what matters is not whether you fail or not. Because failure is guaranteed.

What matters is how you handle that failure. What matters is where you choose to go from there. 

For me, shining means sitting with the failure, feeling the pain, letting it hurt. And then learning what it was there to teach you. Growing. And then moving forward so you can take more chances, try again, and apply your learnings. So you can learn, take a chance, fail, grow, learn, take a chance, succeed, take another chance, fail, learn, grow and keep doing it over and over again. 

I believe that it’s the only way to move forward.

Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.

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