Working to stay open. Painting. Working. Reading. Learning Korean. Journaling. Wanting to do more of my own stuff but spending time supporting and talking to the kids instead.
As I fill out forms for diploma names and baby photos, I am keenly reminded of the passage of time and that everything else can be done later but the kids are only here now and I will prioritize them fully while we have this ephemeral time together.
We often forget how ephemeral everything is. How the things we worry about today will completely disappear tomorrow and there will be new things and unexpected things.
So it’s best to enjoy this moment right here and be grateful for what is and keep it all in perspective.
I know the sentiment is that if we always had 3-day weekends we’d get used to it and they wouldn’t be great anymore.
For two years in the early 2000s, I worked three days a week. I never got used to it, I never took it for granted. I worked hard during the three days, managed a team, got promoted. And during the other two days I volunteered and visited museums and did things that mattered to my soul.
I usually start the year with a lot of plan and goals and todos. It’s something I enjoy and helps me feel like I hit the ground running and started the year on the right foot.
This year, I wasn’t feeling it. Instead I started January slowly and without aggressive goals. I’ve slowly been shedding the requirements, expectations and the rush of getting things done.
My husband has kindly been taking our youngest to the bus drop off so I can start my mornings slowly and enter the day quietly. I’ve been taking breaks and each time I feel the anxiety rise around how behind I am, I take a breath and then let the issue go. I am not behind. All is well. Whatever needs to get done is getting done.
The rest is bonus.
If I fill all the moments up, there’s no space to be open to the unexpected and no space to be open to surprise.
This is one way I’m intentionally creating that space.
So much of life is an inside job. We all grow up being told how to behave, what to aim for, who to be.
And then we have to spend the rest of our lives unraveling that and really looking within to see who we want to be, what brings us joy, what feels good and what is truly meaningful.
I find that a big part of being able to stay open for me is going within and being really clear on what matters to me and then making choices that bring those things to the front of my life.
No one else can do that for me. It’s an inside job.
I can’t wait until the days are longer again and I can’t wait until it’s no longer raining in California.
I’m grateful that days without sun are so rare here. I find that sunshine is one of the things that helps me stay open. Just like sand and sea, tall trees, birds and mountains. Nature is so healing and so wide open.
I took a while to read this book because I knew it was going to be really sad. And it was. The horrible story of abuse and gaslighting told through a creative and beautiful memoir reminds you that abuse is not reserved for a certain kind of relationship and it exists between same-sex. relationships too. It’s heart wrenching and brutal.
This might be one of my all-time most favorite series to read. The Wayward children series is so creative, so original and each of the books is so unique. This one might be one of my favorites in a long time, which is a little odd to say because the subject matter is so tough and so heart wrenching. I really really appreciated the author’s note in the beginning, it allowed me to enjoy the story and be present instead of triggering the whole time.
I felt so much compassion and love towards Antoinette, who loses her father and her life from thereon is never the same. One day, she walks through a door and finds herself in the place where the lost things go. But like all the places in these books, things aren’t what they first seem.
This book is so sad and yet so very beautiful. I really loved the themes around innocence, loss and time.
with gratitude to netgalley and Macmillan Audio for an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review
This story was hard to follow for quite a bit of the beginning but eventually I couldn’t stop reading because I wanted to know what happened to Maali and what the photos were about. As the story slowly unravels, we learn so much about Sri Lanka’s political situation and get to know these amazing and interesting characters. This book has some of the best one-liners I’ve read anywhere. It’s visual, rich and an experience unlike anything. But it also requires patience and endurance to be willing to stick with it.