Another shot from San Francisco.
I still haven’t decided whether I am doing the Week in the Life or not but I am still taking photos and trying to document a bit more than usual in case I do decide to do it. I took 121 photos today and some 130 yesterday. So far, so good.
I finally completed some long-standing items on my todo list. I have like 45 more but I am feeling more optimistic. Even though I started my day with an art journal page that made me unhappy enough to cover the whole thing. I did work on some more pages later in the day and I am trying to teach myself to let go more. Not try to be perfect. To practice. That’s the goal. Practice.
I know this photo is terrible but the sentiment is so amazing that I had to put it there. I love that David goes and hugs his brother randomly.
The little boy laughs a lot. All day long. He’s just a happy little one.
A lot of people ask me how I can get work done with two kids and no help, but this is a common scene in my house. The big boy sitting at the table, playing. The little one crawling around and playing too (or napping) so I can do it cause I have the world’s best kids.
Late afternoon, David and I practiced writing all the words he’s learned to spell. There’s around 14 or so. He whined a bunch but he did write them all 5 times each. But I am not sure how much he retained. Baby steps, I tell myself.
And here’s one I snapped while he was playing with his Didj.
I am totally hooked on the song “Gives you Hell” the Glee version and can’t stop listening to it. Now that the kids are in bed, I hope to get creative therapy ready and then sneak in a quick art journal page before Glee. Let’s see if I can pull it off.
Note to Self:
After I finished Karen‘s new book, I saw that she was having a retreat right here in a few weeks. I immediately wanted to sign up but then I worried about going alone. Was it a bad idea? Would I feel lonely and crappy? I asked two different people at two different times but neither could go. So I spent ten days mulling it over back and forth. I am not so great at going to places by myself. But I really wanted to do this. So last night I just bought the tickets and decided to take the plunge. I am anxious of course but I am also excited. I certainly could use a full day to meditate and listen to the amazing Karen talk. Here’s to taking a step on my own.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Glee! I am so excited about tonight’s Madonna episode.
2. We woke up to pouring rain today but then the sun came out and it was such a beautiful day that it lifted all my bad moods immediately.
3. I am grateful for the few but important tasks I’ve accomplished today. My scheduling technique is working a bit so far. Not bad.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Legos! They have taken over the dining table.
2. He had a wonderful day at school today where each class was a different city and they “flew” from city to city and played games, ate snacks, did crafts. When I picked him and asked about his favorite part of the day, he said “I am grateful for the whole day, mommy.”
I am one of those people who is always on the go go go. I literally have a list of fifteen things I try to get done everyday. I do so many things simultaneously, too. I feed the baby while I read my book or do some craft with my son. I watch TV while I do my art journal. (I am watching it right now as I write this.) I am very accomplishment-oriented. Or at least execution-oriented. I am a big doer. Relaxing is not my thing.
There’s this time at the end of most Yoga classes where you lie down and you have to lie there, be present and not think, not sleep, just be aware. I always hated that part. My mind would go on overdrive and think of the fifty thousand items to put on my todo list. Or things I was supposed to have done that day. Or how I forgot to call. On and on. Let’s just say I never actually relaxed.
But over the years, this is something that I’ve grown to value more and more. I’ve taken enough classes to value the importance of resting and recovering, especially after a time of hard work. And I’m also trying to learn to take the time to pause and observe. To just do nothing and be more aware and be more mindful. I think this is really important.
It helps me assess my emotions and control my reaction to things happening around me. Even when I can’t stop myself from making the same mistake, making it with awareness is actually helpful. Pausing allows me to pay attention. It allows me to step back. It also allows me to be more grateful. To observe the million little things that happen in my day that I would otherwise not notice or gloss over.
So now, I am trying to pause more. Observe my kids playing when they don’t know I am looking. Pause while creating a piece of art. Listen to my husband while he talks instead of planning my response or tuning out. Pause while I feel sad or uninspired or frustrated. Pause so I can give the feelings a lot of attention and then let them go, so I can exchange those feelings with gratitude for what’s here. For who’s here.
It’s hard for me to pause, but I think it’s very valuable and I am working hard to take the time more and more. Even if it’s in millisecond increments. I hope you take a few seconds to pause today, too. Go out for five minutes and just observe nature. Be grateful for the very ordinary things today. Pause to notice them.
They are the miracles of life.
The following is cross-posted from the Weekly Gratitude Blog. I will post there every Tuesday and decided to post those posts here, too. For those of you who read both blogs, I apologize in advance. Some weeks the content might be different and other weeks, exactly the same.
I love Nature. I cannot get enough of it.
Today, I was all set to put in place my new schedule but, as always, my day went on an unexpected path. I hadn’t decided if I was going to do A Week in the Life or not (still haven’t) so I figured I’ll take some photos just to have them either way.
I grabbed my camera as Nathaniel was having breakfast and as I snapped one shot, the camera went insane. It flashed “err 99” and then the shutter wouldn’t stop clicking. So I took the battery out and put it back in. One more photo and then the craziness again. After six more attempts the camera simply wouldn’t stop. Even with different lenses or batteries or CF cards. Even with no CF card. A bunch of research on Google explained that my camera’s shutter was kaput and a replacement would be around $300. Since I was planning on upgrading anyway, I decided this was a sign from the universe.
And I bought a Canon 5D Mark II. And since my 10-22 won’t mount on that. I went ahead and bought a 17-40L. And I bought an 85mm 1.8 since the 50 is wider angle now and not as perfect for portraits. Man that 1.8 is sharp! I don’t even need to sharpen my photos anymore.
So I have a lot to learn with this new camera but I love it already and I am giddy with joy. When the battery did fully charge, I went ahead and snapped hundreds of photos for WIL in case I do decide to do it.
Nathaniel is still walk-crawling in his funny way. But at bedtime he was playing with David and did actually take 5 whole steps!
And one of David, of course.
He looks so much like me in this photo. It always amazes me.
David kept trying to get him away from the chair, thinking he would fall down but Nathaniel is getting into everything now. He is unstoppable.
And I also captured one of him lifting the curtains at bedtime. His favorite activity is looking out that window.
I have hundreds more.
We chatted with my aunt Ruthy in England today and also chatted with Mom and Dad while they ate dinner and while my mom was in bed. I love Skype. And David and I did some fun stamping today. I am hoping tomorrow will be more “typical” and I can be more productive. I also hope nothing else breaks.
Note to Self:
I decided recently that I will change some of my vocabulary. More like how I put things. I say “Oh I can’t make cards.” when I mean to say “I don’t like making cards.” I feel like the latter makes me sound pompous. But the former makes me sound like I am putting myself down. And a long time ago a friend told me that it’s best not to put yourself down too much because sooner or later people believe you. I worry so much about sounding cocky that I think I overcompensate sometimes. I think knowing yourself and knowing what you like and don’t like and want to spend your time on and what you don’t want to spend your time on is important. And I want to use that language more, for me if not for others around me. I want to pay attention to what I say, how much I belittle myself. Because doing it to myself is almost like giving others permission to do it to me, too.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am so grateful for my mom for being so generous with me. She’s amazing.
2. I am so grateful to my husband for putting up with my kind of crazy. I am certifiable and he loves me anyway.
3. I am grateful for my new camera and the joy it’s already bringing into my world.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Stamping with mommy’s stamps
2. Skipping veggies for lunch
This week’s craft was inspired by this (I am so sorry, I seem to be missing the source. If you know it, let me know and I will add it.):
The hardest part was finding the wooden pegs. We finally ordered them online and it was way to expensive for what it is. But anyway, they’re here now.
We wrapped some fleece on one and tied with fabric thread. Then he wanted to paint hair so we added a headband.
Then we drew a face and here we go!
We then made another one with a black shirt and green pants. We did add hair to this one later too.
Not nearly as amazing as our examples but still, simple and super-fun!
A shot from San Fran from yesterday’s trip.
Today was not a good photo day. I was in such a funk that I did not feel inspired to take photos.
But of course I took a few anyway.
He’s almost one. My year of taking daily photos of him is going to come to an end. And then what do I do? I think I will focus on both kids more. David’s been a bit neglected (photographically) this year and I want to capture him more often, too. Knowing me I will likely create a schedule to ensure I capture each kid at least weekly or something like that.
Feeling sleepy. Haven’t I been saying that every day this week? It feels like I’ve dragged down and can’t get up. I will need some sort of jolt of adrenaline. Got any?
I will sadly admit I didn’t touch my art journal this weekend. Nor did I read more than 3 pages. Ugh. Here’s to hoping the week is more productive than the weekend was.
Note to Self:
I am not exactly sure why I am in such a funk lately. I feel unproductive, disinterested, tired, and too overwhelmed to be productive. Days are passing uneventfully and that’s inspiring me even less making the frustrating day even more unbearable. I hate it when I go to this place where nothing at all is inspiring or motivating me. But I still fight it and don’t sleep (like I should) and don’t play (like I should) and instead I lie on the couch, sulk, and make everyone else suffer.
I was just listening to a book which talked about how your attitude is in your control and how you can choose to be positive. Which I wholeheartedly believe. At the same time, I can’t seem to get myself out of this funk. I’ve listened to music, I’ve gone outside, I’ve watched movies. I haven’t done some art so I am off to do that now but not much seems to be working….
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Nathaniel took his very first step today. It was for a split second and if I had blinked I would have missed it. But I didn’t and it was a moment of pure pure joy for me. I am so grateful I got to see it. I know soon he’ll be walking and it will be no big deal but it is to me.
2. I am grateful that so many people share their talents online. I am so inspired by so many artists and I am so grateful for blogs and for getting to see everyone’s art so readily. What an amazing luxury!
3. I am grateful that my kids go to bed so early. I really need the quiet time tonight and I think I will actually head to bed soon, too.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. He got to play a tiny bit mor Wii today and that was a major highlight.
2. He’s been obsessively playing with his legos lately and it’s really most of what he does all day and he loves loves the little lego men.
This is done with the January A Million Memories Kit.
Journaling Reads:
There are very few photos of the two of us.
This was taken on one of those rare occasions where I asked Daddy to take some photos of us and I am so glad this particular photo is here.
This sign I am holding was something I made for my desk. Something for me to remember. But I am so glad it’s in this photo of the two of us because it’s also something I want you to know.
I want you to know that you are NOT alone.
You will never be alone.
I will always be here for you.
Over the years, you may choose to come to me for things or you may choose not to.
This is something you will have to decide.
But I want you to know that regardless of what you choose,
I will always be here for you. On any day.
At any moment.
For any reason.
I will forever be your mom and I will forever be here for you. For as long as I am alive, I can promise that you will never be alone.
I love you with all my heart.
Today started out blah like everyday in the last week but then I’d asked Jake if we could go to the city for the day and walk on the Golden Gate Bridge (which is on my list for the year) and it was a fantastic day in the city so we decided to go do it. And it was absolutely awesome. More about this in a few Saturdays.
As soon as we parked, I asked Jake to take a photo of us. Nathaniel had napped in the car so he was still groggy.
And one more of us.
There are many more photos but I will save them for the 52 Things entry and post some throughout the week. As it turns out my camera is really dirty. I generally leave my shutter wide open to 1.8 but of course today I had closed it to 8 or 16 to capture some of the beauty which sharpened all the dirt and man there’s a LOT of it. I will have to get my sensor cleaned very soon.
Nathaniel’s been able to stand on his own for quite some time but for some reason I could never get a photo of it and finally today I managed to catch one.
I am going to wrap this up cause the babysitter will be here in 15 minutes and I still have to go get dressed. Happy Saturday.
Note to Self:
Wow, I’ve decided one of my biggest pet-peeves is guilt tripping. I so very much hope that this is not something I do often and I plan to do it never and I absolutely abhor it when others do it to me. It’s such a passive agressive way to communicate. A class I took a long time ago always said that you ask for what you want and you take what you get. You take what you get. I think it is important to remember to do that. Not to feel sorry for yourself. Not to make others do something for you out of guilt. What a horrible way to get something you want. Not only will I no longer cater to such people but I will work diligently to ensure I don’t do it. It’s amazing to see the effect it has on me when others do it and what better reminder for me not to do it to anyone else?
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Getting to walk across the bridge. It was loud and windy but also incredibly fun and stunningly beautiful.
2. Even more grateful that we didn’t have to walk all the way back. Jake ran back, grabbed the car and came to pick us up. Yep, my superhero.
3. Very grateful for date night tonight. A wonderful ending to an incredible day. I am truly blessed.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Wii, of course. Today was the Wii day.
2. Going to San Francisco. David ran, skipped, jumped, and walked across the bridge with us and didn’t complain one single time.
Here’s this week’s item:
17. Decorate my entryway walls.
When you walk into our house, we have this little room that we use as the guest room. It’s got this long, long wall that leads into the living room and kitchen where we usually sit. Many, many months ago, I bought this leaves art to hang on that wall but it had been sitting in the room, packed waiting for my mom. So when she came over, it was one of the first things I wanted to hang:
To the right of the leaves, we put two things I’d bought from Japan back when I lived there. A frame with a prayer and another frame with six kabuki masks. To the left of the leaves, we put the paintings my mom made when she was 27. I spent most of my childhood looking at these and they have a special place in my heart.
Here’s a closeup of how the leaves look:
Here’s the other side of the room.
The couch and chairs are from Ikea. The side table close to the door was from Pottery Barn back in 1996. The keys hanging above it are also Pottery Barn and the drawing above them is one of my Mom’s drawings. Here’s a closeup of the keys:
On the other side of the couch are two tables that I just bought from Pottery Barn. The nest and candle holder are from At Home America and the lamp is an old one with a new shade from Ikea. And the pumpkin is also from Pottery Barn.
Here’s the other side of the room:
These two paintings are new:
They depict Istanbul and the ferryboats I used to take to go to Burgaz.
And I adore them both.
That’s it for the guest room. Stairs next week.
One week from tomorrow Nathaniel turns one. One. I can’t believe how quickly a year passes. So much has happened in that time and yet it feels like it was just yesterday that I was in the hospital, giving birth to him. I will write more next week, I’m sure but I find myself wanting to document more and more of him before the moments pass.
He loves walking on the edge of our large couch and grabbing David’s toys.
When I tell him to put it down, this is what he likes to reply with.
And then he puts it right in his mouth. He’s gotten better at not eating things that aren’t food. He will still put it in his mouth first, but he will spit it out.
He loves playing with the TV and has learned that the Tivo remote turns it on. As soon as he or I pick it up, he looks at the TV to see if it turns on. Today he managed to record two shows and almost bought some stuff on the Tivo.
He loves playing with this toy, especially when it’s up there. He loves standing up and leaning over to play with it. He can stand up and down all by himself but he hasn’t walked yet unless one of us holds his hand.
His most favorite thing to eat is a tangerine. He can clear one off his plate in under two minutes. He also really loves drinking water ever since he’s figured out how to do it and doesn’t ask to nurse as many times a day now. (He was thirsty my little boy.) He also loves to eat all fruit, bread, cheese, yogurt. Some items on the so so list: meatballs, pasta, and veggies if mixed with yogurt.
He loves bath time and plays with (chews) all the toys. He doesn’t complain when I dump water on him but you can tell he’s shocked each time. As I am getting him dressed, he loves to squirm away and lift the blinds and look out the window. I always act surprised as he crawls that way and he giggles as he lifts the blinds. When I put him to bed, we play this game where he picks up his little rabbit and throws it. I giggle. He does it again and he giggles too. It’s wonderful until I walk away which is when the crying commences.
I love him so much, so deeply. There are no words to express my love.
Not to leave out David, I wanted to take the time to note three words he still says incorrectly but in the most amusing way. He will say sarcaspert instead of sarcastic. Destruction instead of construction. And protective instead of detective. They each make me laugh so much that I almost don’t want to correct him. (He also uses “for” instead of “so” often but we do try to correct that a lot.)
Long, useless day here. I am glad weekend is here and I hope it will give me some rest time.
Note to Self:
As promised yesterday, I spent some time getting organized today. I basically chunked my day into sets of hours. I first marked the things I cannot get out of like driving David to school and back, etc. Then I marked recurring things like meals, bathtime, bedtime, etc. And then I took the chunks of hours for work and allocated specific tasks to each part of the day, giving me cushion time to check my mail, handle last minute things, etc. Then I added some kids and me time. And finally some just me (or Jake and me, depending) time. I put specific tasks on days they need to get done. For example, I post on the Weekly Gratitude blog on Tuesdays so I generally write that Monday night so I added it to Monday’s calendar, etc.
I don’t know if this system will work or not but I am hoping it will stop the “I have so much stuff, which one should I be doing?” phenomenon I seem to be suffering from lately. Cross your fingers for me.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. This week, I am super grateful it’s Friday. I was last week too. I need to sleep this weekend and get myself some much-needed relaxation.
2. I am grateful that we have a babysitter coming tomorrow and I am looking forward to date night tomorrow, watching the movie Date Night.
3. I am grateful that I got organized. I am hoping this will work because I really need it.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Playing with legos. Again 🙂
2. Playing rockets at school
So here are some pages I did last week. I’ve been working hard not to be a perfectionist with these.
I wanted a representative page for Carla Sonheim’s Silliness class so I cut out the crazy animal from the 0th class and colored it with my copics and glued it right on there.
The rolled up papers on this page were inspired by Somerset Apprentice Vol 2, art by De Anna Welch. For fun, I then cut out a butterfly and heart and covered them with glossy accents.
Closeup of the heart and butterfly.
And one of the papers.
This next one was inspired by Somerset Apprentice Vol 1. You can actually see this one on the web page. It’s the one with the canvases backwards by Connie Govea Stuart. I took a tiny canvas I had, put some fabric in the back and tried to make a nest with a blue egg. The tiny word says domestic.
It didn’t turn out as magnificent as I would have liked but you live you learn. Closeup of the nest:
The back of that page was also inspired by something I saw in the same issue but I can’t even remember what anymore. You can’t see it but the cage and bird both have wax on them.
closeup:
The next page in the journal was watercolor paper, so inspired by Nancy Lefko’s article in Art Journaling Winter 2010, I drew pears, colored them with watercolor pencils and water soluble markers:
and on the back, I drew some flowers and did the same coloring:
And finally, this piece was inspired completely by Somerset Apprentice Vol 1, too. This beautiful art in the magazine is by Sara Naumann.
And I am still filling those pages. Albeit slowly.
And that ends week 3.
Our theme for April is nature.
The journaling reads:
In 2003, Jake and I took two months to drive across the United States. It was one of my biggest dreams to do this trip. We went to forty states. Instead of doing all the big cities, we decided it would be more pleasant to visit each of the National Parks so we mapped our trip accordingly. Especially since we planned to camp a lot.
It was more beautiful than I could have imagines it. We visited the White Sands, the Painted Desert, the Great Sand Dunes, the Everglades, Yellowstone, the Grand Tetons, Zion, Bryce among many others. We saw canyons and caverns, sand and lava, swamps and mountains. The beauty of this country is vast and varied. And it’s breathtaking.
What’s even more amazing is that you can buy something called a National Parks pass which, for a small fee, will get you into any of the parks for free, for a whole year. It was the best purchase we made the whole summer. I am so thankful we live in a country that preserves nature.
Lovely.
Today I felt all out of sorts again so I decided it’s finally time to get organized again. More below.
David spent some quality time making Nathaniel laugh today. It’s one of our favorite things to do. He was fake falling from the couch.
And making Nathaniel laugh.
Over and over.
Again and again.
It was such a joy for both of us. And then the little boy quietly went to play.
I made a whole bunch more journal pages. All to come tomorrow. Yey.
Note to Self:
So I decided I am going to make a schedule for my week. For my days too. I have weekly occurrences and daily events. I won’t plan to the minute but I will plan chunks of time. Making sure all the tasks I want to get done professionally and personally are allotted their time. I want to make a list of all my tasks and just kind of put them in zones and then see if it works for a week or two. I meant to do it tonight but Jake ended up needing some help so it’s at the top of my list for tomorrow, so I will tell you more once I do it.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I took a walk around the neighborhood tonight all by myself. It was great to smell the flowers, listen to a good book, and be alone for just a bit.
2. I am grateful for helpful people at work. I had to ping 20 people for a request today but I finally got someone who was there and generous with their time.
3. I am grateful for good doctors. I needed a prescription and I didn’t even have to go in and my doctor was so kind as she always is.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Playing with legos. He’s really loving it!
2. Playing with Noah’s whistle at school
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projects for twenty twenty-five
projects for twenty twenty-four
projects for twenty twenty-three
projects for twenty twenty-two
projects for twenty twenty-one
projects for twenty nineteen
projects for twenty eighteen
projects from twenty seventeen
monthly projects from previous years
some of my previous projects
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