I woke up this morning feeling rested for the first time in a long time but then I got cranky and whiny and just unmotivated to do anything at all. I am obviously in a mood lately and I wish I could snap out of it but I’ve learned from months of experience now that I just need to wait it out and it does go away. Cycle of life I guess.
At some point I decided to just bite the bullet and work hard and then workout and I was really glad I did. I have been worried that I was losing some of the hard work I’ve put into exercising since all I’ve done this last week was 1mile walks and they were tiring. But today I felt better so I walked for 2 miles and could probably have gone for a while longer. I am still trying not to force my knee so I go slowly but it was still good to do 2 miles. I will get my knee brace tomorrow and let’s see if that helps at all.
By early afternoon, I’d not taken any photos of the kids so I snapped some of the little boy while he tried to make a mess with the lego box.
He wouldn’t give me a smile but I still love these. I love his little hands. Soft hands. I love having him sit next to me on the couch and hugging him and smelling him. He’s growing up so fast. I love that he gets jealous when David hugs me so he cuts in to hug, too. I love that when David was lying on the floor today and I told Nathaniel to give him a hug, he walked over and lay on top of David to give him a hug. I love them so much.
i got a few of my older boy, too. Those magical blue eyes.
They can pierce my soul.
I’d promised David we could spend some time together after I finished my work. So I took a little break at the end of the day and colored with him. I did the girl and he did the boy.
The kids are eating and watching a little TV. I made my peace with the fact that there will be a bit more TV than usual around here for the holidays. Not a lot but a little more. That’s ok with me.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that my parents are coming tomorrow night. I haven’t seen them in too long and I miss them. I love them so.
2. I am grateful that I get my hair done tomorrow. I feel like changing it up but I am not sure how. Let’s see if she comes up with something.
3. I am grateful for a little perspective today. I’ve been feeling sorry for myself a lot lately (more on this tomorrow) and several people have been giving me perspective which I sorely need lately.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. watching chloe’s closet
2. playing with nathaniel
3. coloring with mommy {* his pick for the journal}
Journaling Reads:
This is a common scene in our house: David doing something and you watching him, wishing you could do it too. On this day, he was outside having Daddy pull him around in the little red wagon. At first you were watching him with confusion and interest, not sure what you thought, but then you saw him smile and heard him laugh and it didn’t take you long to deduce he was having a lot of fun and within seconds your face was scrunched up and tears were running down your cheeks. This was the very best version of “It’s not fair!” you could display without speaking. There was much wailing and of course, Daddy heard you (along with all the neighbors, I’m sure!) so within minutes you were in the wagon with a big smile. You might not talk yet but you sure know how to get your way already.
I had big plans for today. I’ll admit it, most of my major to-do list items for the rest of they year are completed. And yet, I’ve been creating a bit of work for myself. Which is stupid. I know this and yet I can’t seem to stop myself. So I had a full plate for today, all of which went out the window when Nathaniel decided that 3am was a perfect time to wake up for the day. We’re on something like day twenty without a normal night of sleep. We had bad tummy, teeth, time change, drippy nose, etc, etc. Many excuses to wake up all over the place. But I am officially worn out. (Actually I was like a week ago.) and I need to find a way to work with him so he goes back to sleeping relatively normal hours.
Anyway, so I got up at 3am tried to get him to go back to sleep but there was a lot of yelling. He doesn’t cry, just screams. REALLY loudly. I then took him in my bed but to no avail. Around 4-4:30, I just gave up. And thus began our day.
I figured it meant nothing was going to get done today, so I actually got to work right away. I did some of the mindless work I had left from last night and then I did a bit more after David woke up and I fed the kids, etc. Despite the early wake up, Nathaniel was in good humors.
After I put the little boy down, I took a little nap on the couch while David colored. Then he played on his Didj for a while and talked about how good he is at it.
Here’s the “just take the photo so I can move on, Mommy” look.
And here’s a spunky one from Nathaniel.
And one more.
After lunch, I finally felt ok enough to do the treadmill. I’ve been taking it slow. My knee is still in pain so I am walking just one mile everyday. Which is definitely effecting my stamina because I was barely able to do it today. Then again, it could be getting only 3.5 hours of sleep. Anyway, I am still doing it even if a little.
The rest of the day was more craftiness, hugging and watching TV and just lying around, enjoying a quiet Sunday. I did end up accomplishing most of my to-do list and I even backed up my computer which is always a good good thing. Here’s to hoping the little boy actually sleeps past 5am tomorrow.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that Jake comes home tonight. Our life just doesn’t feel complete without him.
2. I am grateful that this is a short week at work. They tend to make me super-productive and I am hoping this one will not be an exception.
3. I am grateful for my aching muscles. While i don’t like the pain, they are a sign of the fact that I am still working out and working on becoming healthier. So they can ache as much as they want.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. watching sprout. {* his pick for the journal}
2. playing with my didj.
3. playing with my legos.
Journaling Reads:
Nathaniel, I must tell you that you have some magical powers when it comes to getting your way. You are really good at being charming and pointing at things you want. Most of the time they are things David wants or has or does. And you often start by asking nicely and snuggling up to get it from him. But David’s learned his lesson and doesn’t always give in. Then you start the whining and crying and we love you so much, we often give up and let you have what you want. You’re a lucky boy.
I ended up staying up much later than usual last night so I woke up all tired this morning, which meant I just relaxed and enjoyed my morning with the kids and with checking email and blogs. While I was on the computer, the kids put the pillows on the floor and fell on them and laughed. Watching them laugh gave me endless joy.
Then they started playing legos.
Nathaniel would give the pieces to David and he would put them together. It was amazing to watch and they were so so cute, I almost cried. Nathaniel even got up and hugged him.
Because I missed it, I tried to get him to do it again so David helped me out. But Nathaniel wasn’t biting.
So David just hugged him anyway.
Then he started playing Wii and Nathaniel played by himself. Fully content and happy. (Look at the way his legs are sitting. Yikes.)
It’s been pouring rain here so when Nathaniel heard it, he rushed to the back window and watched it all come down. He was really excited and confused at the same time.
David took a lot of breaks today. He just didn’t feel like playing Wii if you ask me. Another example that if I just let him do it, he will get sick of it and do other things. He colored, played, and then found a Sudoku book so we did it together and he colored it.
We did a lot of cleaning up today. Went through all of David’s stuff in the living room and my piles all over. I am sure it will all accumulate again but for now it’s so much cleaner and so much less overwhelming and I have so much more room to put more scrapping stuff. I also did a big crafty projects I’d been thinking of for a few days. It turned out quite neat, but took hours and hours. I have no patience as I find out again and again. So the plans for tomorrow are to keep things simple. And play with the kids for hours. Cause really there’s nothing else I’d rather do.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that we cleaned up so much. I feel lighter and more librated.
2. I am grateful that despite the relaxing day, I finished a big task (well, 90% finished) that was on my list.
3. I am grateful for my kids and my husband and my sister and my nephews and my parents. I just feel so loved and so grateful. I often worry that I do not have those close friends I seem to think I need but I have such an amazing, loving, supportive family and I am so deeply grateful for all of their kindess, company, love and kindness.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. coloring. {* his pick for the journal}
2. playing wii.
3. doing sudoku with mommy
So today was a great day! I put a bunch of tasks on my calendar last night so that I would keep getting alarms and just finish the tasks. And that’s exactly what I did! I did my work, my tasks, my exercise and even made some videos. I even went to the doctor because my knee’s been hurting a bit so I wanted to make sure it wasn’t something really bad. (It’s not. Runners knee. Be careful. Ice. Do inner thigh exercises. etc.) And then after I picked up David, I went grocery shopping with both kids and filled the house with fruit and yogurt and veggies. Yey! Good way to jumpstart my weekend.
All of this meant that I lost sunlight by the time I made it home. So I rushed the kids outside and tried to catch the last tiny bits of light. David gave me some funny faces.
And some sorta sad looking ones.
Nathaniel just ignored me altogether and rejoiced in being outside. Put shoes on, grabbed the ball and went for it.
I love that he’s wearing David’s shoes on the wrong feet. Love this boy.
Love both my boys so much. David and I did another grateful page in his journal and then the kids ate, played, etc. Jake’s out of town for the weekend so I have quiet time to read and craft at nights. My calendar is full of weekend reminders too, so let’s see how many of them I get to finish before he’s back.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that I crossed of some of the annoying tasks on my list. Always happy to have those done.
2. I am grateful that the doctor told me I could keep exercising. I am worried if I stop now, that will be the end of this venture.
3. I am thankful that I talked to a friend tonight who gave me good advice and changed my perspective on something that was bothering me. Now I feel so much better and it’s amazing how a tiny shift can change an entire outlook.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. doing sand art in Native American Day.
2. walking in the Native American Day parade at school.
3. going shopping with mommy and Nathaniel
Journaling Reads:
So many people ask me how I manage to work full time and still take care of the kids without help. The thing is, I have help. Not professional help but you are my greatest treasure. You are kind to me and Nathaniel. You clean up. You help out. It all works thanks to you my wonderful boy. I love you.
Because I thought it would be fun, I videotaped myself while making this layout so you can watch it if you’d like.
And it’s not even for the reasons you might think. I don’t like shopping and don’t spend hours online buying things. But I love looking through etsy and discovering more independent artists. I love the web. I love reading the blog of someone I admire, and then being able to go to their etsy store and purchase a piece of art by them right away. I love being able to support them and have them be in my life, and inspire me.
When I moved to my house and saw this huge empty wall in the living room, I knew immediately that I was going to cover it with the works of artists I admired. Artists who made me happy. And looking at this wall makes me happier than any other piece of art in my house.
I am so thankful that we live in an era where people can share across the globe. That I can see, be inspired by, and support an artist miles away. Whose work I would have never ever seen otherwise. And I love the thousands of souls who create art and put it out there for people like me to get inspired.
I am so sorry about all the emails you just got. I was trying to update some old posts to make sure they had the right categories and unbeknownst to me, the program decided to just email them all out. It won’t happen again and I apologize profusely.
Journaling Reads:
One of the greatest joys of having a little boy around is that he can find laughter and joy in the smallest things. You found that when you stepped on these sheets your feet stuck a little and made a funny noise. IT was so cool to you that you kept doing it again and again and laughing and giggling each time. Within minutes David and I were watching you and giggling along. You have made our life so much better and filled it with laughter by just being you. Thank you my son.
I read the Backyard Saints between long novels when I thought I needed some down time. I have mixed feelings about the book but I think, over all, it’s not a favorite. Not that there’s anything wrong with it but the author’s voice didn’t really speak to me and I feel like the time spent reading that book could have been better spent elsewhere.
I also think i need to work on my review-writing skills. Just feel like that time is better spent reading 🙂
I was low on photos today. Not exactly sure why. I have this sweet boy.
And this sneaky one who’s smirking.
I’ve done a lot today. I’ve scrapped, worked, edited and uploaded some videos, played with my kids, walked 3+ miles, and yet I still feel like I have this todo list that I am putting off. Items I don’t want to do but I should. Items that I am wondering if there’s a reason I’m dreading doing them or if I am just tired.
I must admit all this exercise is making me tired. and worn out. I am going to try to power through tonight and get a bunch of items done and maybe the euphoria of that will help me get the others done. That’s how it works isn’t it?
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that I am still working on the getting fit project. I have lost 12 lbs so far. Not enough but still a good start. I am working at this goal with determination.
2. I am grateful that my parents are coming next week. There’s some stress with visitors but I missed them so much and I love them so much.
3. I am thankful that I have only one more item left on my calendar. Which means I am home for the next few days after tomorrow. I can relax, play with my kids, and not feel like I have to be somewhere when I’d rather be home.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. playing with the big yellow alphabet classroom toy
2. music class at school
3. having daddy come home early cause he came home late last night
