Weekly Reflection 2017 – 46

How I shone this week:  I could lie and say that this past week was better than the last, but honestly I am not sure that it was. My days have been going really fast and without a lot of awareness. Within each day, I am trying to make sure to do the things that matter the most for that day. I make sure to exercise, I make sure to work hard, I make sure to spend time with my kids and my husband, I read, etc. but when I put all the days together, I am not sure that they are adding up to the week I want to have. Or maybe they are and I am overthinking it. I don’t know to be honest. On Thursday this week, it poured here all day. It’s pretty atypical for that much and that kind of rain to go all day here. By early afternoon, I really didn’t want to go to the meeting at the kids’ school that I had said I would go to. But this was for Nathaniel and I feel he’s already getting the shorter end of the stick in general, so I went. I drove in the dark, in rain, in heavy traffic to get to the school early and of course in the end I was really really glad I went. I think that and the time I made sure to make for Jake this week were my shiniest moments of the week.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: this was an emotionally tough week but not for me. well also for me, but not about me. we made some progress at work but not as much as I would have liked. 
  • Personal: exercised, scrapped, ate soso, a bunch of journaling around 2018
  • Family: did Calc with David and Python and Math with Nathaniel. Went to SWI night and took photos!

I celebrate: getting a little extra social time this week.

I am grateful for: my kids’ school providing so much to them and to me.

I nourished myself by: spending extra time with friends and enjoying the company

Reflecting on my worries:  I exercised. the eating issue still bothers me not even because i am eating badly, I am not eating that poorly. What bothers me has been the lack of nutrition. I did make plans for 2018 a bit so I feel better there. My energy seems to be waxing and waning. it will all be ok.

I let go of: trying to make everyone happy. i can’t do it.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love): 

  • bold: bold with doing what needs to be done lately.
  • mindful: mindful that i am a lot more tired than i’ve been, i think it probably does have to do with food.
  • nourish: i am trying to see what more nourishment I can add here, so that i feel more energized
  • love: i love that my nephew is coming this week!

What made me laugh this week: my friends, a good week.

What I tolerated this week: emotionally taxing week trying to support my colleagues.

My mood this week was: hanging in there.
I forgive myself for:  trying to just make it by. 
What I love right now: that I am still exercising!

Here’s to a great week 47. So few weeks left in this year!!

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 44

How I shone this week:  My mom and Dad left this week and while it was quieter than last week, I think I am feeling wiped at this moment and I don’t feel motivated to do many things. Considering all this, I still did a lot this week and feel pretty proud of how much I shone anyway. I showed up for work, for my kids, for my kids’ school and for Jake. My nephews, too. I wasn’t perfect for anyone but I showed up.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: did a few more things but not done 🙁
  • Personal: exercised, scrapped, ate soso, zero journaling, didn’t start DD yet either 🙁
  • Family: did math with both kids and coding with N, checked in with nephews and took family photos!

I celebrate: remembering what matters most. my work computer died this week and while it would have unraveled me before, i was able to be mindful about how little this matters in the scheme of things. 

I am grateful for: i have been in such a grateful space lately. Again and again.

I nourished myself by: resting a bit more.

Reflecting on my worries:  I exercised. i ate not great, but not awful. i’m getting more organized. working hard on letting people down less. 

I let go of: my dead computer and getting a replacement soon.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love): 

  • bold: bold and tough changes at school.
  • mindful: mindful that i need time off
  • nourish: i still need to forcefully go back to my healthy eating
  • love: i love that the kids have no school this Friday.

What made me laugh this week: a lot of laughter at work.

What I tolerated this week: feeling very unmotivated.

My mood this week was: blah.
I forgive myself for:  not being into things lately. needing rest.
What I love right now: being able to rest a small bit more.

Here’s to a great week 45.

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 43

How I shone this week:  This was a good week but also another crazy one. A lot of leadership was away at an event so I had more free time than usual this week but my parents were in town so I gave all of my free time to them. I also volunteered at my kids’ school on Friday all night. I am now a little sick and really, really spent. I am trying to shine but I am not sure I have it in me to do anything but rest for a bit.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: cleared a bunch of email but not fully caught up. no survey, no posters, yet. didn’t write or brainstorm enough. i will have to catch up this week assuming i don’t get sicker.
  • Personal: exercised, scrapped, ate soso, zero journaling, didn’t start DD yet either 🙁
  • Family: spent time with family, but did no math, no project planning, nothing. boo. did take photos.

I celebrate: i got promoted this week so I am going to go ahead and celebrate that.

I am grateful for: getting to spend so much time with my parents.

I nourished myself by: not much this week unfortunately.

Reflecting on my worries:  I exercised. i ate not great, but not awful. i did let some people down but came through for others. trying to get it right more often than not. fail sometimes. 

I let go of: getting work done this week. 

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love): 

  • bold: i had a lot of bold conversations for my kids’ school this week.
  • mindful: mindful that i need sleep and rest so i don’t get sicker
  • nourish: i need to forcefully go back to my healthy eating
  • love: i love my family so much!

What made me laugh this week: Nathaniel, Kelly, my husband. Love them all so.

What I tolerated this week: being semi-sick all weekend.

My mood this week was: rushed.
I forgive myself for:  not getting it all right. i just can’t ever seem to.
What I love right now: i love that my parents are here!!

Here’s to a great week 44.

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 42

How I shone this week:  I spent all of this week in Seattle. Here are few ways I shone:

  • I tried to spend a lot of time with each of my colleagues and have the hard and deep conversations
  • I woke up each morning at 6am to exercise even though I felt exhausted
  • I talked to my kids and Jake every morning before drop off and every afternoon after pickup
  • I balanced social dinners with alone time and tried to get a reasonable amount of each.

None of it was perfect but I did show up and try my best.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: hmm i didn’t stay on my email this week. i’ll have to clean it all up at some point. i think the summit did go well. i made posters, yay! I did spend time both with T and C and see my friend Radhika! 
  • Personal: exercised every morning, ate on the clean side let’s say, i didn’t journal even one time there :(, did mapmaker 12 and brene art, scheduled November project and did my scrapping system.
  • Family: did math with both kids. Did not finish plan for D. made all of the lunches.  checked in with everyone. took photos and i am spending time with mom and dad!

I celebrate: being back home.

I am grateful for: I am really grateful to be back home in my own bed and super grateful my parents are here!

I nourished myself by: taking alone time when in Seattle so I could make sure to have the energy needed.

Reflecting on my worries:  I exercised. i ate not great, but not terribly. I didn’t organize my life at all. i did get a lot done in Seattle but indeed not enough. It definitely wasn’t a waste. I am not sure about the disappointment but I am trying to feel better in my head.

I let go of: making sure everyone is happy.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: i had a lot of bold conversations this week.
  • mindful: mindful that i need sleep and recovery
  • nourish: i still need more sleep.
  • love: i love my family so much!

What made me laugh this week: sweet Radhika and her family and all my work friends.

What I tolerated this week: a low-grade headache all week.

My mood this week was: tired.
I forgive myself for:  not being able to do all the things I wanted to.
What I love right now: i love that my parents are here!!

Here’s to a great week 43.

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 41

How I shone this week:  I think this week was a little better than the last few weeks. Monday was a tough day for me, Tuesday was better but then David fell at school and has been in so much pain. I’ve tried to be gracious, hardworking, and grateful all week. But I feel I am at another juncture where I need to step back and re-jiggle my schedule and life a bit and can’t seem to find the time to do it. I will be away on a business trip next week so that could give me some time or it could end up being even busier than usual. If I get lucky, I plan to use some of that time to design my schedule better. 

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: wasn’t great about email this week but I cleaned it up all on Friday so I’ll call this a win. Did the deck and plan and email. Doing the posters. Evaluating results and booked SYD totally. Haven’t made plan for life in SEA fully but I did send a blender to my hotel so I am determined to make things work. I also plan to go to the gym every morning. Here’s to hoping it is so. 
  • Personal: exercised 5 times, didn’t eat much better (but not poorly), journaled twice, did mapmaker 11, and started brene’s art. came up with a plan for november, didn’t do donations or taxes, did do the scrapping system.
  • Family: did math with N but not spelling. Did not finish plan for D though came up with another plan too. Went to third grade coffee. Checked in with my family often. Took photos and will make lunches on Saturday.

I celebrate: new beginnings.

I am grateful for: I am feeling an overwhelming amount of gratitude this week. for all aspects of my life. deeply thankful. my kids, my husband, my manager, my parents, my sister, my nephews, my friends, i am just all around full of gratitude.

I nourished myself by: some solid connection with friends this week.

Reflecting on my worries:  I exercised. i ate okay. i am not super behind, catching up. david was okay. i’m trying to give more attention to nathaniel. not totally bad news. i’ve been okay but the disconnected feeling is still there. i plan to work on it more.

I let go of: looking good to others and focused on doing what’s right for me.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: taking a new exercise class on tuesday when my usual plan was canceled.
  • mindful: mindful that i need to step back and plan my life
  • nourish: i need more sleep.
  • love: i love the gratitude i am feeling lately.

What made me laugh this week: My friend Tamara and I laughed so much.

What I tolerated this week: still rushing a bit too much between school and work.

My mood this week was: grateful.
I forgive myself for:  being sad on Monday.
What I love right now: i love that i took an impromptu walk with my neighbor and her friend on Tuesday night. go me.

Here’s to a great week 42. We’re down to 10 weeks until it’s the end of this year! 

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 40

How I shone this week:  This week started with the horrible news of what happened in Las Vegas. I woke up 6am on Monday morning and before I did anything, I saw the CNN alert on my phone. I had gone to bed early enough on Sunday that I hadn’t seen it. It made me so sad that the undercurrent was there all week. I always find myself worrying about the smallest things all the time and this was a reminder that I need to have more perspective and a better understanding of things that matter. (and things that don’t.) I am still really sad about all that’s been going on in the last few months in the world. (not that there aren’t really horrible things going on all the time but I feel like there’s been a lot of devastating natural disasters back to back recently.) I feel like while I am still mourning one horrible tragedy, there is a new one and I haven’t even processed the previous one yet. Just a lot of sadness. 

This week was another hurried one (are there any others at this point?) but I managed to support my kids, their school, work and my family. And still exercised and ate relatively ok. I am proud of myself for making it through lately. That’s just going to have to be good enough.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: wasn’t great about email this week but I just sat down and cleared all of it so I am caught up now, did some initial plan for October, didn’t even look at the dashboard, did the deck but not email this week, did posters, didn’t evaluate form results yet. 
  • Personal: exercised 6 times, had two client calls, eating 5% better than last week, journaled once, did mapmaker 9 and 10. Finished Brene’s class (nonart work). Scrapping is also going well.
  • Family: supported david all week. went to 3rd grade social, didn’t check in with sis and nephews as much as i would have wanted, will do better this week. Took photos!

I celebrate: having a good balance between work, me, family, school and friends this week. I went to the kids’ school 4 times, met with a friend once, supported both kids with school work, took six exercise classes, and got some decent work done and even managed to have some lovely time with my husband this week. I put this week in the win column. 

I am grateful for: the amount of support i have in my life. a really loving family, an incredible husband, kids who are the kindest, a few solid friends, and a really supportive manager. I am quite lucky.

I nourished myself by: exercising this week.

Reflecting on my worries: i did a bit better on the eating over all. also gave myself some more grace. i think i need to still work on chocolate but i won’t take it on now. i’ve been better about catching up. one day at a time. i am sure i did disappoint some people but i am trying. everyday i get to try again. and david’s week was okay so far.

I let go of: knowing the answers, controlling the outcome. cause who am i kidding?

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: driving to the high school for a many-hour meeting.
  • mindful: mindful that i am still feeling overwhelmed and seem to have an undercurrent of sadness.
  • nourish: i need a daily dose of nourish. healthy nourish. make the time each day. 
  • love: love feeling done with a big item on my list. even if it only lasts a moment.

What made me laugh this week: Jake and I laughed a lot. 

What I tolerated this week: still craving some alone time. also some more downtime.

My mood this week was: sad.
I forgive myself for:  being really stressed on Thursday.
What I love right now: i love that i booked my tickets to SYD. it’s a big relief.

Here’s to a great week 41. 

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 39

How I shone this week:  This was a crazy week for connection, on Monday I was with my sister still, then Tuesday I saw my friend Haven at night, Wednesday I was at the kids’ school teaching Lit Club, Thursday I had breakfast with my friend Leslie and then briefly met a work friend, Petra, and then had lunch with another friend, Baris, from work and then on Friday I spent a lot of my day with my friend Kelly. For this introvert, this is a lot of socializing in one week. But I survived it, I thrived. I showed up and was my best self most of the time. I am proud of myself.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: kept email pretty clean this week, working on the october trip, did the deck but not the dashboard at all and no posters yet.
  • Personal: had a great client call, exercised 5 times, ate so-so, journaled twice, haven’t done mapmakers or brene yet, did do the scrapping system.
  • Family: met with all friends and more! did math with both kids, David went and came back from camping successfully, checked in with everyone but not enough, took photos!

I celebrate: all the connecting time this week

I am grateful for: the wide variety of friends i have.

I nourished myself by: having deep and meaningful conversations this week.

Reflecting on my worries: i did exercise. i ate so so. i did have a hard time driving to san jose but i made it. chocolate is still a pain point. i disappointed myself. i am still playing catch up. i am ok with my reading.

I let go of: being able to catch up in one week. it will take some time.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: driving to san jose and back.
  • mindful: mindful that i am feeling overwhelmed
  • nourish: connection was nourishing 
  • love: love love love a quiet weekend

What made me laugh this week: i with my friend Kelly.

What I tolerated this week: not getting enough sleep or alone time.

My mood this week was: tired.
I forgive myself for:  my ticket.
What I love right now: i love my quiet weekend.

Here’s to a great week 40. 

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 38

How I shone this week:  My sister was here all week! Which was wonderful and while the early part of the week was filled with work, we got to spend some quality time together towards the latter end of the week. And it was wonderful. Of course, I am behind at work, in reading, and more but this kind of time with my sister is once in a life time. Books will still be here and so will work. My way to shine this week was to remember that.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: cleaned email, did blog post, started planning October, did the deck and posters. Still need to think about meetings and no work on the dashboard.
  • Personal: no client call this week either. exercised. ate okay. journaled but only a little. did mapmaker. didn’t do brene’s class. no solution to chocolate 🙁 did the scrapping system.
  • Family: did math with both kids, did back to school night, did school chores, and took photos!

I celebrate: a whole extra week with my sister!

I am grateful for: my sister and all the help she lent me this week!

I nourished myself by: eating as well as I could this week. 

Reflecting on my worries: i apparently didn’t post a living intentionally last week so we’re going to go with i had no worries! lol 🙂

I let go of: getting things done while my sister is here. and reading.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: taking all the minutes i could to be with my sister.
  • mindful: mindful that i will have a lot of catch up this week. but that it was worth it.
  • nourish: i’ve been more relaxed this week but i’m trying to be mindful about it.
  • love: love love love having my sister around.

What made me laugh this week: i laughed a lot with my boys and sister and at work, too.

What I tolerated this week: not getting enough alone time.

My mood this week was: overwhelmed.
I forgive myself for:  craving some alone time.
What I love right now: i love having my sister here and her wonderful energy.

Here’s to a great week 39. 

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 37

How I shone this week:  Well this week took an unexpected turn. My sister called me Sunday and asked me if she can come Monday night. She was in Boston and was planning to come in three weeks but due to a last minute change, she decided to show up. While it was absolutely wonderful, between that and my taking the day off on Tuesday, this week was very crunched so there was much running around to squeeze in going to school and work and exercise and of course being with my wonderful sister. Maybe shining mostly looks like surviving lately for me.

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: i don’t even want to tell you how behind I already am in email. did the blog but not done yet. finished deck and posters. didn’t do October get together. Dashboard still needs iteration 2. moved meetings.
  • Personal: no client calls this week in the end. didn’t journal 🙁 ate okay and exercised. did mapmaker 7 (not 8) , didn’t start brene’s class, no solution to chocolate but i did continue scrapping.
  • Family: did math with both kids, did chores for school, had bday!, checked in with family and took photos!

I celebrate: getting to celebrate my birthday with my sister!

I am grateful for: my sister! my hubby! my boys! 

I nourished myself by: lots of exercise this week. 

Reflecting on my worries: all the days worked out and so did making more room so i could be with my sister.

I let go of: getting it all right this week.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: back to seven days of exercise.
  • mindful: mindful that i need to figure out how to balance things better this week.
  • nourish: i need to stop with the chocolate!
  • love: having my sister around.

What made me laugh this week: i laughed a lot with my boys and sister.

What I tolerated this week: not getting enough work done.

My mood this week was: tired.
I forgive myself for:  not getting enough done.
What I love right now: i love having my sister here and i know i will figure out how to balance things out.

Here’s to a great week 38. 

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 36

How I shone this week:  Here’s how I shone this week: I made it through!! This was an insane week. Monday was a holiday. Tuesday I took off to be with Jake for his birthday but then worked at night until 7pm and then went to bed soon after so I could wake up at 3:45am and get on a plane to Seattle where I spent all day working and then made it back home 1:30am that night (next morning?) only to wake up 5 hours later and go to Nathaniel’s class for a grade lead meeting. And then drove to work and then back up to the school for David’s back to school night. Friday, I went to exercise at work, drove back home to take a phone call for a school event i am helping chair, then i went to midday book club and then back to work until 6pm and then came home, did math with David and then did work while Nathaniel slept and David went to see a movie with Jake. Phew. I am tired just writing all of this down. But I did it all. I tried to do it with grace, too. I showed up. For work, for jake, for my kids, for friends, and for myself. phew!

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: Cleaned email! (though already a bit of a mess now) Didn’t do blog post, went to Seattle, sent the email, started the dashboard, got the email done.
  • Personal: Exercised only 4 times but it was all that was feasible. Ate clean save for the chocolate (even during travel) Didn’t journal enough. Did mapmaker 6 but not 7 yet. Did OLW September and cashed check. I am continuing with my fun new scrapping system and I love it. 
  • Family: went to school for back to school night and N’s conference. We had Jake’s birthday day and took photos. woot!!

I celebrate: surviving this week.

I am grateful for: traveling safe. being safe.

I nourished myself by: sleeping and exercising as much as possible.

Reflecting on my worries: I managed to exercise as much as possible. i survived wednesday and thursday. david had a good week. nathaniel is making friends and adjusting well. packet may or may not be a disaster. time will tell. i got stuff done! things are ok. flight had no problem, i made it back in time. i did not disappoint Jake. phew!

I let go of: being mean to myself about the chocolate but i do want to experiment with trying to stop.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: all of this week was bold.
  • mindful: mindful that i need to get more rest this week.
  • nourish: this one is all about chocolate and letting go of the need to have it.
  • love: i love that my life is so full and textured and varied and layered.

What made me laugh this week: i laughed during book club and with my friends at book club.

What I tolerated this week: not enough sleep!

My mood this week was: tired, worried.
I forgive myself for:  being anxious.
What I love right now:  i love that I have a day off this week (i am taking it off for my birthday.) and that this week is getting closer to a “normal” week.

Here’s to a great week 37. 

2017 Stories – 35 – Our Eclipse Adventure

As the summer was coming to a close, Jake and I kept talking about how we wanted to see if we could squeeze in one more quick holiday. We went to Australia at the beginning of summer so we felt like we wanted one quick one. We thought about SoCal or Tahoe or the middle of California. But couldn’t settle on one.

And then he suggested that maybe we should go see the eclipse. I told him everything was sold out (like six years ago.) The more we looked into it, the more it became impossible to pull it off. So he suggested we email my sister in law who’s originally from Ashland to see if we can pick her brain.

As it worked out, she was going to be in Ashland and had a friend who would let us stay at his house (and he was going to be out of town!) we hemmed and hawed for a few more days but then we just decided it was meant to be and we had to make it happen.

We got up early Saturday morning and got on the road to Ashland. It took us a long time to get there, but when we arrived, we got to see how her friend’s house was absolutely amazing, at the top of a hill with deer and other wildlife around us. It was truly such a gift. 

We spent Saturday and Sunday in Ashland, with the kids playing with their cousins, and just relaxing. Sunday night we went to bed at 7pm and got up at 11:30pm so we could do the four-hour drive to Totality. We were worried about all the potential traffic so we decided to get on the road super early. We had some idea of where we might want to stop but we also weren’t sure what the situation would be like. 

As it turned out, we had no traffic at all. We got to a rest area a little before where we had intended to stop so I told Jake we should check it out since it had bathrooms and all. It was very full but we found a spot pretty close to the bathroom and with a great view of the sun. It was 3am at this point, so we tried to get some sleep (we weren’t super successful.) and then patiently waited till the eclipse. 

We got really lucky with the rest area which had a lot of bathrooms, all of which were being cleaned regularly. There was a church nearby passing out tea and coffee for free. When it came to be time, everyone ahhed at the same time and the birds flew away in fear. It was such a sense of community and a moment of awe.

I had given Jake such a hard time for wanting to see the 100%. Ashland had 97% so I wasn’t sure why we really needed to travel four hours just to see the extra 3% but I was so wrong. My very favorite part of the entire thing ended up being the one minute where I could watch it without glasses. It was an awe inspiring moment that I will never forget for the rest of my life. It was 1000% worth it. I’m so grateful we did it.

When it was over, we’d planned to go straight home even though it was 10+ hours of driving. As it worked out, we took 7+ hours to get back to Ashland and by then it was 7pm so we decided to spend the night in Ashland instead of doing something unsafe. (especially since we hadn’t slept the night before.)

So we spent one final night in Ashland and woke up super early Tuesday to come right back home. All in all, it was a crazy, insane, magical and one of a kind adventure!


Stories from 2017 is a year-long project for 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here.

Weekly Reflection 2017 – 34

How I shone this week: This week was an adventure. It’s not like me to go into the unknown the way I did this week and I am proud of myself for that. I am proud that I showed up, all of us worked together to make all this possible and the adventure was one of a kind. I feel wonderful about it. 

Things I wanted to get Done:

  • Work: Behind in email again of course. Bought tickets to Seattle but didn’t do the blog post. Almost done with September but still needs one final read. No work on dashboard, did the email.
  • Personal: Exercised 6 times this week in 4 days. Ate pretty clean, did quite well when away. Journaled very little and am still working on mapmaker 5. 
  • Family: we had fun! were open minded!! went to Nathaniel’s orientation, David had none in the end. Prepped for school and took a ton of photos!

I celebrate: our adventure!

I am grateful for: this wonderful summer. my family. my boys, and my husband. so much my husband.

I nourished myself by: spending a lot of family time!

Reflecting on my worries: i managed to exercise and ate reasonably well while away. eclipse was amazing!!! didn’t fall off the wagon at all. nothing went wrong.

I let go of: certainty.

Core Desire Check-in (bold, mindful, nourish, love):

  • bold: i was bold about our adventure. 
  • mindful: mindful that school is about to start which is both good and bad. i like routine but getting into it will be tricky. also that nathaniel is going into a new school and will need help transitioning.
  • nourish: as we transition into fall, i want to be creative with the foods i will eat.
  • love: i love how much gratitude I’ve been feeling lately.

What made me laugh this week: lots of family time with Jake’s sister in law and laughter in the car, too. Amazing how much we didn’t fight considering we were in the car for 30+ hours this last weekend.

What I tolerated this week: a lot of car sleeping.

My mood this week was: awed.
I forgive myself for:  being tired.
What I love right now:  i love how full I feel right now (mentally, physically and emotionally) in a good way.

Here’s to a great week 35.