I decided to take it easy today. Give myself permission to relax and not accomplish much. And I certainly did not accomplish much. I’d say barely the bare minimum. But that’s ok.
There’s still so much love in our household.
It makes me so happy and fills my heart with joy.
In the afternoon we took a short walk so I could take some photos and we could all get some sunshine.
And then we came home and the kids played. Nathaniel is getting better and better at playing by himself.
Especially with the blocks. He loves them and spends hours figuring them out.
And I don’t know if you can see it here but he makes noises and funny faces while he plays. That’s my favorite part.
I worked, rested, read, walked, took photos and now I am heading to the garage to clean up a bit and then back here to work on some catalysts and then it’s bed time for me with my book. Some days are like this.
Note to Self:
I made an entire entry on my note to self today so that’s what I’m going to leave it at.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Our little walk around. Always good to get some sunshine.
2. I spent a long time talking to a parent about private schools today. Something I’m struggling with and I am so thankful she took the time to really explain a lot to me. I wish I had this guidance last year.
3. I am thankful for a quiet-ish day that meant I didn’t go deep into a funk and was able to make some plans to help me more regularly. I also cleaned up my mail which makes me happy. Didn’t respond yet but did clean up a lot.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. daddy.
2. i’m grateful for finding some of my legos (he means in other bins for different toys, he discovered he still had some legos hiding in the boxes.)
I’ve been feeling a little off for a few days, now. Nothing terrible but I can feel the negative feelings creeping in. The negativity is running constant conversations in my head, keeping me from being productive, and most importantly, from being happy.
Today, I decided it was time to do something about it. I think it’s time to create a bit of a clearing for myself. And I want to tackle it both physically and psychologically.
So I started to make a list of things I want to do:
– Go through and unsubscribe from all email lists (ALL of them)
– Clean up the little pockets of clutter in the living room (like the mail bucket, etc.)
– Move scrap albums to a new location where they can all be together and organized
– Clean out and clear off under my scrap table
– Reply to emails I have been putting off responding to (from laziness more than anything)
– Clear out the mess by my side of the couch
– Fold and put away laundry
– Clean out fridge, throw away anything that’s no longer good
Some other things:
I’ve noticed that there are certain blogs I read that make me feel bad. This has nothing to do with the blogger him or herself. It’s because of the state I am in right now that I find myself feeling resentful, frustrated, and upset. And I am not feeling these things in a productive way where it’s causing me to get excited and motivated. Instead, I feel not good enough. Not enough like these people. Not enough in general. And while I’d like to think and say that I am better than that, for now, while I am in this negative state, I decided maybe it’s best I stop reading them for a while. Until I stop comparing so much. I piled them all up and put them away in a folder called “not anymore” and one day if I feel stronger, I can venture there again. And if not, that’s ok too. Their life won’t change cause I stopped reading them but mine might.
Tonight I’m going to make a long list of things that are bothering me right now. I will look at the list and pick out any of the actionable items. If they are things that can be changed, fixed or otherwise modified, I will put them on a different list and assign dates, times, durations, action plans to work on them. If not, I will journal on the others until it’s a bit out of my system. The next day, I will journal (or art journal) some more. I will do this on and off for a few weeks.
I realize that I have some long term plans I made that are not interesting/fulfilling to me anymore. These are not commitments to other people (just to myself) and I think it’s time to revisit some. For example, today, I was supposed to be working on creating digital downloads for my site but I kept dreading it and dreading it and when I sat to do it. So I decided today that I will no longer be doing them. At least not regularly. If the fancy strikes me again, I might. Or if I feel like I have some ideas, I might. But I don’t want to feel pressured and like it has to get done. I have a full-time job, two kids, and a lot of other more important (to me) commitments. It’s time to stop feeling guilty and stressed about the less important stuff. If you were coming to my site just for these, I am truly sorry to disappoint you. Feel free to send me an email and I’ll let you know if/when they start up again.
My eating habits and my exercise (lack thereof) habits are on my mind lately. I want to work on both. I am not sure exactly how and I want to be mentally ready to commit to whatever I decide. Find something that works for me. Maybe the trick is to commit to something and then just go for it. Not sure yet. But I plan to work on a plan for this, this week, too.
And finally I want to make a list of things that I do which end up making me feel frustrated or upset. This will take some time but each time I feel frustrated, I plan to track it back and see what event I did triggered it. I know it can always be traced back to me. Once I find the root, I can eliminate it.
There’s likely more to go on this list but this is where I am for now. I think this is actually a biological slump, the one that I get regularly but I am using it as an excuse to do some things I should have been doing all along.
Catalyst One Hundred and Fourteen is: What are your best/worst memories of school?
Thoughts:
During my senior year in college, my husband, his roommate Jason, and I spent an exorbitant amount of time playing a computer game called “Full Throttle.” It was many years ago and so the games weren’t nearly as sophisticated as today’s games are. The game’s main character is a motorcyclist and you can make him do things by clicking on items and choosing an action. Depending on what you chose the character reacts. For example you can click on a door and choose “open,” etc. You can also choose a garbage bin and choose “lick” which will then make the character say “I’m not puttin’ my lips on that.” Which we would do over and over again just to hear him say it. In one part of the game, the character is looking for a secret passage and has to find it by kicking this wall all over until he finds it. If you try for a long time, he says “I’ll never find that secret passage.” and since I was quite bad at the game, I heard that over and over again. To this day, it’s one of those rare memories that brings me right back to my college days and my husband and I use random sentences from the game all the time. Like an inside joke.
I love the fact that I’ve known my husband for so long and we have so many memories just like this.
I tried something with layers and blending and stuff and I’m not sure I like it but here we are.
This morning Jake and David did some scooter-time. I’m not sure we’re making a lot of progress with it and I am really worried about that for reasons I can’t really explain.
And then they threw a football around for a while and Nathaniel watched them from inside the house.
Then Daddy went to work and Mommy got to work and Nathaniel decided it was time to show David some love.
Here he is in process.
And landed.
We went out to lunch cause I was going stir-crazy and then when we came back I had a meeting so the kids played quietly.
and then gave each other more hugs.
After my meeting, I worked some more, David and I picked some legos, and then it was dinner time. I have to rush this tonight cause I still have to put them down, get ready, do art, and go to my book club.
Note to Self:
I’m in a really bad mood again. I need to keep track of this to see if I can find a pattern. Maybe I’ll just go read through my entries cause I do think it happens quite regularly. And it sucks.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Grateful for book club tonight. Looking forward to going out.
2. Grateful that I took the time to go out instead of sitting at home and sulking. It helped a lot just to get out.
3. Grateful that I have great kids who are so great at playing by themselves.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. playing football with daddy.
2. i’m grateful for looking at legos.
I know I said I was taking a scrappy break but yesterday I was on My Mind’s Eye’s blog and I saw this sketch and I never work from sketches but this one spoke to me and I had an idea immediately. So much so that even though I’d planend to do it this morning, I sat down and did most of it last night. Since my photo was landscape, I rotated the sketch clockwise by 90 degrees.
I made this layout to remember that David helps out a lot around here. With the food, diapers, cleaning, playing and anything else I might need. He’s a truly amazing little boy and I don’t thank him nearly often enough. So that in my weaker moments when he’s driving me insane, I can remember how amazing he is. And so he remembers that I do appreciate him. so very much.
All products except for the letters are My Mind’s Eye. I put my border punch collection to good use.
details:
I am not a morning person. I can be chipper and alert and happy and productive and anything else you need me to be at night but I am not a happy camper in the morning. Before I had kids, I slept in as much as I possibly could and routinely stayed up late.
But then I had kids.
My kids wake up early. And I mean early. Most mornings, the little one is up by 5:15am. Even though I’ve learned to go to bed early, I am still bleary-eyed and miserable at that time of the day. And it used to take me quite a few hours to wake up and find my balance. Often times, it would be 9am before I felt awake and alert. That meant that I wasted almost four hours of my day every single day, feeling groggy and tired.
Since trying to convince my son to sleep longer didn’t work out, I decided to try a new routine. For the last month and a half, I created a list of projects for myself that I “schedule” for first thing in the morning. I give myself until 6:30 or so to wake up and then I sit at my table and work on my project. This project might be art, scrapbooking, journaling, sewing, stitching, knitting, or crocheting. It’s often something visual and something I do with my hands. It generally takes anywhere from 30 minutes to 90 minutes (depending on the project and on my kids’ patience). By the end of the allotted time, I have a lovely project I just created and I am fully awake. And, more significantly, I feel a sense of accomplishment and I am in my happy place.
This has become the most wonderful new routine. It starts all my days in the best way possible. It means I’m wasting less time, trying more of the projects I’ve wanted to do, and I am even more patient and kinder with my kids since I feel more awake and happier.
If, like me, you’re not a morning person, I urge you to try this. If 90 minutes is too long for you, try 30 minutes. Make a list of techniques you’ve wanted to try and try each of them for 15-30 minutes every morning. You’d be amazed what you can learn in that little time.
The following is cross-posted from the Weekly Gratitude Blog. I will post there every Tuesday and decided to post those posts here, too. For those of you who read both blogs, I apologize in advance. Some weeks the content might be different and other weeks, exactly the same.
Nathaniel seems to be sleeping in late on the weekends and waking up early on weekdays. Not sure how he does that since he goes to bed at the same time each night. But I am still grateful for the extra sleep. So he woke up early today and I was too tired to do anything. I watched a bit of TV while I nursed and we relaxed until David woke up. After breakfast, I let them watch Toy Story 2 which I had just recorded for David on the TiVo. I tried to get a good photo of them watching but I couldn’t and of course it lasted a mere second.
Then Nathaniel napped and I worked and David played. And then it was craft time and Nathaniel watched us while we worked.
As we waited for the glue to dry, the kids ran around and played and laughed.
And I caught this shot of David.
And then he hid while the little one played some more.
And then it was dinner and now we’re going up for our bath. Days pass quickly when you’re having fun.
Note to Self:
I’ve noticed that it’s actually better to do no more than 1-2 crafts/art a day. When I do more, I like it but then I feel burned out. If it’s more like a long-term project where I get a lot done and do a little each day, it doesn’t ever get me to the burned-out place. So, as with most things, small bites and patience almost always pays off.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Grateful for Jake coming home early. It helps me so much when he’s around more to help.
2. I am grateful that despite feeling a bit bummed, I still feel a deep sense of peace.
3. I am grateful for some more craft time tonight. I am really enjoying making all this art and scrapping and sewing. What a luxury.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. watching toy story 2
2. crafting with mommy
2. i’m grateful for daddy.
I’d like to say this amazing marketplace inspired us but really our project this week is so terrible that I cannot even remotely compare it to this incredible project.
I am really not good at doing these projects without detailed instructions and we’ve been running behind a bit so we didn’t have a lot of time this week to do it. But he really wanted to do this one. So we did it. We opened up some windows, made some floors.
We then cut up paper to cover it with.
I only had sparkly modge podge so it’s super-sparkly. And I am so not proud of it and almost didn’t even post it.
But David’s delighted and thrilled and loves it. He’s already put his men on it and they’re wearing parachutes so if they fall off, they don’t get hurt.
Amazing what a little cardboard can do when embellished with a child’s imagination.
I moved my schedule around for June but it seems I haven’t saved it, so while I fix that, here’s the project from this morning.
Here’s the link to the tutorial for these fun and super-simple balls.
And here’s mine:
I literally did it while I was waiting for Jake to pickup the baby sitter.
David’s a fan.
And so is Nathaniel.
Love easy peasy projects that are also fun for everyone!
Odd kind of day today. I think I felt good most of the day but now it’s 8:25 or so and I still have a long list of things I would like to do before bedtime comes and feel a bit depressed that the likelihood of that is low. Even though most of the day was decent, the ending is coloring my perspective and making me remember this as a not-so-great day.
I started the morning by finishing my book, which I loved. I’ve already begun another. I then did some sewing, some knitting, some playing. And Nathaniel gave his brother some more hugs.
Then David and I used the bean bag numbers to create some large numbers and read them out loud. We practiced for a while.
While Nathaniel was napping (and I was reading) David and Jake watched some World Cup.
When Nathaniel woke up, they chatted with Jake’s parents on Skype and then he watched David play. He loves watching David play.
But he hates it when David puts the toys out of reach.
David wanted to return some of the love and hugged him a bunch, too.
After his second nap, Nathaniel woke up groggy and unhappy. He cried for some time and then seemed ok. He played for a while and then fell on his face while walking and busted his lip a bit. He was really sad but I am quite proud that I didn’t freak out. He’s totally ok now but it was swollen a bit (not sure you can see it so well but this was the best shot I got.)
And now the kids are sleeping and I am trying to make good use of the last few hours of the day while I watch the Tony awards. Another weekend zoomed by. Another month halfway here. It’s stunning how fast time passes.
Note to Self:
i was thinking that I enjoy doing a week-in-the-life project and I do take a lot of photos but there are certain things that can only really be captured by video. And I rarely ever take video. So this week I decided to do A week in the life, the video version. I took a bunch of video already and I hope to continue. All are short little snippets to give a flavor of our life now. It might not work out or it might be a nightmare to edit but for now, it’s something I plan to keep working on. Let’s see….
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that I spent a lot of time creating things this weekend. I like making things and I especially like making things for my family or things that I use regularly.
2. I am grateful for the internet. I did a project today that I would otherwise have spent days trying to figure out but thanks to the net and thanks to YouTube, it was all possible. I am so thankful to live in these times.
3. I am grateful for our quiet, little life. It’s hectic sometimes but, for the most part, it’s simple and full of love. We’re all so very lucky and I am thankful so very much for that.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. watching a lego movie with daddy.
2. mommy.
This is with the February kit from A MIllion Memories.
Once the knows he’s got your attention,
he will stop at nothing to see the smiles.
Aren’t you so very lucky?
Not a good photo day. Happens sometimes. I spent the morning playing with some fabric and while I was doing that, Nathaniel made a mess with my yarn and crochet thread. He made quite a sizable mess.
I then went to the hairdresser which was long overdue. Then I came back and finished my project while Nathaniel was still napping. When he woke up, we went to lunch cause it’s been absolutely beautiful outside. We did a bit of fruit shopping and then came back home. I rested and cleaned up while David played the Wii and Nathaniel tried to balance one of my bean bags on his head.
And then he walked around more, creating a trail of mess right behind him.
By then it was dinner time so we ate and now we’re getting ready for bed, winding down. After then are comfortably in bed, we get to go on our date night. Short but great day!
Note to Self:
It’s amazing to me how quickly one can go from feeling good about oneself to feeling bad. I’ve been feeling happy, secure and generally good about myself lately. Nothing too amazing but slightly better than usual. Then today something happened (or actually something i wanted to happen didn’t happen) and here I am all doubting myself and feeling small already. It amazes me that I allow others to have this much power over me. I need to learn to have faith in myself.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Date night! Always look forward to date night.
2. I am so glad to finally have my hair cut and dyed. Yey.
3. I am so thankful for a quiet, wonderful, family-filled Saturday. Simple is exactly how I love it.
Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Daddy
2. wii!
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projects for twenty twenty-five
projects for twenty twenty-four
projects for twenty twenty-three
projects for twenty twenty-two
projects for twenty twenty-one
projects for twenty nineteen
projects for twenty eighteen
projects from twenty seventeen
monthly projects from previous years
some of my previous projects
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